Cawfee Tawk
Sorry, kids. At work today and busy busy busy.
Ice Prince is doing okay. His face is covered and he even has a chicken pock on his eyeball. But it's not slowing him down much. He's home with Fresh today and I'm trying to get some stuff done here at work.
So talk amongst yourselves. Don't even have time to give you a topic.
Tuesday, June 15, 2004
Monday, June 14, 2004
| UCAUTION |
| IN THE INTEREST OF SAFETY IT IS ADVISABLE TO KEEP ICE QUEEN AWAY FROM FIRE AND FLAMES. |
From Go-Quiz.com
Friday, June 11, 2004
The Queen is pleased.
Boomer has written his review to the tune of "New York New York" all by himself! I'm so proud. My little banker is growing up!
However, it touts the sale of my DVD, so now I have to design the cover, etc. etc. Stay tuned for that.
"Start spreading the news
The Ice Queen's on stage
You need to see it to believe it, buy the DVD, buy the DVD
That $15 dress
Lights up the stage
The funds go to a good cause
Buy the DVD, Buy the DVD
She's got B-Girlz Conchita, Hard Kora, and Barbie Q
And 4 dancing boys dressed as girls too
She sings and she dances
It's a sight not to be missed
She'll raise a fortune with it
Buy the DVD
It's a special show just at Fashioncares
Patti and Icey don't just sing anywhere
It's up to you, buy the DVD, buy the DVD
Buy the DVD"
All funds from the currently being designed DVD of Mass Humiliation go to my Pride and Remembrance Sashay. (Run? In the heat? Besides, they don't care as long as I pony up the dough. Or do they? How about a scooter? Maybe I could rent roller blades......I'm "hell on wheels in a black dress" - name that tune, my current fave for motivation.)
Boomer has written his review to the tune of "New York New York" all by himself! I'm so proud. My little banker is growing up!
However, it touts the sale of my DVD, so now I have to design the cover, etc. etc. Stay tuned for that.
"Start spreading the news
The Ice Queen's on stage
You need to see it to believe it, buy the DVD, buy the DVD
That $15 dress
Lights up the stage
The funds go to a good cause
Buy the DVD, Buy the DVD
She's got B-Girlz Conchita, Hard Kora, and Barbie Q
And 4 dancing boys dressed as girls too
She sings and she dances
It's a sight not to be missed
She'll raise a fortune with it
Buy the DVD
It's a special show just at Fashioncares
Patti and Icey don't just sing anywhere
It's up to you, buy the DVD, buy the DVD
Buy the DVD"
All funds from the currently being designed DVD of Mass Humiliation go to my Pride and Remembrance Sashay. (Run? In the heat? Besides, they don't care as long as I pony up the dough. Or do they? How about a scooter? Maybe I could rent roller blades......I'm "hell on wheels in a black dress" - name that tune, my current fave for motivation.)
Thursday, June 10, 2004
My lunch date Dear Friend Dave is running a little behind but promises it will make a wonderful story, so I had time to finish my song.
Remember my "Smells Like David Miller" song? (see November archives, Nov 8th.) Well it's time for:
Layton (sung to the tune of Layla by Eric Clapton. Fast or slow version, your choice. If you don't know this song, go sit in the corner for the rest of lunch hour and think about what you've done wrong.)
Well you know you won’t get lonely
With wifey running by your side
You’ve been running and winning much too long.
You know it’s just your foolish pride.
Layton, you’re running in my riding
Layton, and yet I’m still deciding
Layton, honey won’t you shave off your moustache
I tried to give you consideration
’cause I think Mills is such a clown.
Don’t know what to do, can’t fall in love with you,
Although I like Olivia Chow
Layton, the lesser of the evils
Layton, you’re cute but no Mikevil
Layton, darling won’t you ease my indecision
You’ve teeth like little chiclits
Wear pastels just like a pro
You’d do just great in Opposition
Still hurtin’ from my vote for Bob Rae, d’oh!.
Remember my "Smells Like David Miller" song? (see November archives, Nov 8th.) Well it's time for:
Layton (sung to the tune of Layla by Eric Clapton. Fast or slow version, your choice. If you don't know this song, go sit in the corner for the rest of lunch hour and think about what you've done wrong.)
Well you know you won’t get lonely
With wifey running by your side
You’ve been running and winning much too long.
You know it’s just your foolish pride.
Layton, you’re running in my riding
Layton, and yet I’m still deciding
Layton, honey won’t you shave off your moustache
I tried to give you consideration
’cause I think Mills is such a clown.
Don’t know what to do, can’t fall in love with you,
Although I like Olivia Chow
Layton, the lesser of the evils
Layton, you’re cute but no Mikevil
Layton, darling won’t you ease my indecision
You’ve teeth like little chiclits
Wear pastels just like a pro
You’d do just great in Opposition
Still hurtin’ from my vote for Bob Rae, d’oh!.
Queer Eye for the Little Guy
Boomer has been asked to provide a review of the Ice Queen's Fashion Cares DVD. Watch for it.
This morning, Ice Prince, as usual, chose a free paper to carry on the subway. This morning he chose Xtra. This week's Xtra has a woman on the cover wearing only skimpy undies.
Ice Prince also likes to, every night, take a flyer from the girl handing them out outside the Shoe Company. It boldly announces Body Piercing Services on neon paper.
My boy, the urban preschooler.
Boomer has been asked to provide a review of the Ice Queen's Fashion Cares DVD. Watch for it.
This morning, Ice Prince, as usual, chose a free paper to carry on the subway. This morning he chose Xtra. This week's Xtra has a woman on the cover wearing only skimpy undies.
Ice Prince also likes to, every night, take a flyer from the girl handing them out outside the Shoe Company. It boldly announces Body Piercing Services on neon paper.
My boy, the urban preschooler.
Tuesday, June 08, 2004
I'm Here, I'm Queer. Who Knew?
Name Acronym Generator
From Go-Quiz.com
| I | Intense |
| C | Clever |
| E | Edgy |
| Q | Queer |
| U | Unnatural |
| E | Enjoyable |
| E | Exciting |
| N | Naughty |
Name Acronym Generator
From Go-Quiz.com
Stupid Adult Tricks aka Things That Really Piss Me Off
"Was it murder or mishap? That's what police in Brantford are trying to figure out, after the discovery of two-year-old boy's body in a family car.
The search for Noah Gaudet began early Monday night, when he went missing from the front yard of his home, where he'd been quietly playing with another youngster. When his mother came out to find him later on that evening, he was gone."
LATER ON THAT EVENING?! What kind of idiot mother would leave their 2 year old kid outside to play in the front yard? For a couple of hours?! Ice Prince is allowed to play alone in the back fenced yard while I'm in the kitchen with big windows overlooking the yard. If I don't hear any noise for 30 seconds, I go check on him.
I have nothing more to say. I'm speechless!
"Was it murder or mishap? That's what police in Brantford are trying to figure out, after the discovery of two-year-old boy's body in a family car.
The search for Noah Gaudet began early Monday night, when he went missing from the front yard of his home, where he'd been quietly playing with another youngster. When his mother came out to find him later on that evening, he was gone."
LATER ON THAT EVENING?! What kind of idiot mother would leave their 2 year old kid outside to play in the front yard? For a couple of hours?! Ice Prince is allowed to play alone in the back fenced yard while I'm in the kitchen with big windows overlooking the yard. If I don't hear any noise for 30 seconds, I go check on him.
I have nothing more to say. I'm speechless!
The Ice Queen's Canadian Election Special
Having trouble deciding like me? Here's your handy dandy guide to the OTHER political parties in Canada. (Outlaw, not sure what party you thought made us famous. Wasn't the Greens. We did have a party a while back that involved magician Doug Henning levitating himself....we Canadians are wacky folk.)
Parti Citron: Sour to the People! For a bitter Canada, vote lemon!
Platform:
”Paul Martin says he likes lemons, but we see through desperation. As Finance minister for 8 years, Martin did diddley squat to protect and promote our greatest natural resource. Come election time, the Prime Minister is quick to project a pro-lemon image, but his record is clear. Canadians can expect neither responsibility nor crates of lemons with Paul Martin's Liberals.”
Rhinoceros Party
Folded in 1993, but their platform included:
Lower the boiling point of water to save energy, count the Thousand Islands to make sure none were missing, repeal the laws of gravity and breed mosquitoes to hatch in January “so the little buggers freeze to death.”
The Absolutely Absurd Party
Platform:
1. Reduce the legal voting age to 14. "When was the last time a 14 yr old started a war?"
2. “All free trade issues be they with The United States, Mexico or any other Country will deal only with the all-important matter of Breakfast and Lunch. We plan to rewrite the NAFTA agreement to state that Mexico and The USA must supply all Canadians with that all-important first meal of the day: Breakfast. In turn we will supply them with that less then important meal lunch. In fact our negotiation team is presently drafting a deal where The USA and Mexico will supply us with a free all you can eat Brunch and we supply them with a cheap $0.69 Burger with small fries, drink extra.”
3. Streamline the Department of Defense by replacing the Department with a crack, elite squad of Rock/Paper/Scissors
Having trouble deciding like me? Here's your handy dandy guide to the OTHER political parties in Canada. (Outlaw, not sure what party you thought made us famous. Wasn't the Greens. We did have a party a while back that involved magician Doug Henning levitating himself....we Canadians are wacky folk.)
Parti Citron: Sour to the People! For a bitter Canada, vote lemon!
Platform:
”Paul Martin says he likes lemons, but we see through desperation. As Finance minister for 8 years, Martin did diddley squat to protect and promote our greatest natural resource. Come election time, the Prime Minister is quick to project a pro-lemon image, but his record is clear. Canadians can expect neither responsibility nor crates of lemons with Paul Martin's Liberals.”
Rhinoceros Party
Folded in 1993, but their platform included:
Lower the boiling point of water to save energy, count the Thousand Islands to make sure none were missing, repeal the laws of gravity and breed mosquitoes to hatch in January “so the little buggers freeze to death.”
The Absolutely Absurd Party
Platform:
1. Reduce the legal voting age to 14. "When was the last time a 14 yr old started a war?"
2. “All free trade issues be they with The United States, Mexico or any other Country will deal only with the all-important matter of Breakfast and Lunch. We plan to rewrite the NAFTA agreement to state that Mexico and The USA must supply all Canadians with that all-important first meal of the day: Breakfast. In turn we will supply them with that less then important meal lunch. In fact our negotiation team is presently drafting a deal where The USA and Mexico will supply us with a free all you can eat Brunch and we supply them with a cheap $0.69 Burger with small fries, drink extra.”
3. Streamline the Department of Defense by replacing the Department with a crack, elite squad of Rock/Paper/Scissors
Monday, June 07, 2004
It Ain't Easy Being Green
I am seriously thinking about voting for the Green Party. I'm just beginning to research them and so far I like them. Anyone know anything about them that I haven't discovered yet? (legislated cannibalism, etc.) They have a lot of stuff on their website I have to wade through. I saw a brochure of theirs and was very impressed. (excellent graphic design, clever-but not mean-marketing, and so far I like their policies.)
Normally I fall in the Liberal to NDP range, but I'm just not feeling the love this time around. And no, I don't vote strategically, I vote they way my gut tells me to.
I am seriously thinking about voting for the Green Party. I'm just beginning to research them and so far I like them. Anyone know anything about them that I haven't discovered yet? (legislated cannibalism, etc.) They have a lot of stuff on their website I have to wade through. I saw a brochure of theirs and was very impressed. (excellent graphic design, clever-but not mean-marketing, and so far I like their policies.)
Normally I fall in the Liberal to NDP range, but I'm just not feeling the love this time around. And no, I don't vote strategically, I vote they way my gut tells me to.
Thursday, June 03, 2004
Boom Boom Boom Let’s Go...
Boomer is complaining that I didn’t put up a good photo of him. So Lola (new reader) has chosen the following photo in which Boomer “looks hot”. Don’t worry, boys, Lola is just a friend. Boomer is still available. Send your CVs and BVDs to the Icicle Fief and I’ll pass ‘em on.
Boomer is complaining that I didn’t put up a good photo of him. So Lola (new reader) has chosen the following photo in which Boomer “looks hot”. Don’t worry, boys, Lola is just a friend. Boomer is still available. Send your CVs and BVDs to the Icicle Fief and I’ll pass ‘em on.
It’s Ice Queen’s First Annual Festival of Hair!
A walk down memory mane with the Ice Queen. Bear in mind that these are all bad photos of me, posted for your amusement. I really look much better than this.
Bowl cut, super huge 1980s glasses
Reddish brown mullet.
Red Perm, rectangular glasses
That’s Boomer I’m clicking pint glasses with. He’s shy.
Taking charge of yet another special event with a red bob.
Super short strawberry blonde. Hey, you can even see the back! Nice photography.
Okay, go ahead and laugh. Poke fun. Frolic. Enjoy yourselves at my follicular expense.
A walk down memory mane with the Ice Queen. Bear in mind that these are all bad photos of me, posted for your amusement. I really look much better than this.
Bowl cut, super huge 1980s glasses
Reddish brown mullet.
Red Perm, rectangular glasses
That’s Boomer I’m clicking pint glasses with. He’s shy.
Taking charge of yet another special event with a red bob.
Super short strawberry blonde. Hey, you can even see the back! Nice photography.
Okay, go ahead and laugh. Poke fun. Frolic. Enjoy yourselves at my follicular expense.
Wednesday, June 02, 2004
Tuesday, June 01, 2004
The Kids Are Alright
Busy day ahead. Talk amongst yourselves. I'll give you a topic:
Daniel Radcliffe: How many day, hours, minutes until he's legal? He reminds me of Chris Makepeace - star of Meatballs and My Bodyguard. Sigh.
One of my jobs today: find a less offensive picture than the man with the pickle for our newsletter.
Busy day ahead. Talk amongst yourselves. I'll give you a topic:
Daniel Radcliffe: How many day, hours, minutes until he's legal? He reminds me of Chris Makepeace - star of Meatballs and My Bodyguard. Sigh.
One of my jobs today: find a less offensive picture than the man with the pickle for our newsletter.
Monday, May 31, 2004
Voulez-vous Couchez Avec Moi Ce Soir?
Mr. Crabby didn’t want to go to Fashion Cares after all so I got to go with Crabby!
I wore a silver floor length crochet dress (yes, it was lined.) Crabby wore a black Audrey Hepburn-eque sheath dress.
We drank Funkdeified martinis (weird name, but they are sort of like spiked ginger lemonade), I did Karaoke with the B-Girlz . I sang New York New York (there were only 4 choices I chose the one least sung just to get up there). I even had back-up singers and dancers. Afterwards, pink B-girl said I was very Bridget Jones.
I will take that as a compliment – goofy and hapless but charming nonetheless. They will be mailing me a DVD of my performance. I will post the file if I can and then you can download my mortification. And see the nice dress. (NOTE: Boomer just dropped by and said he could make copies of the DVD, so now I’ve decided to design a cover and sell them with proceeds going to my Pride Run fund. Why shouldn’t I/they profit from my humiliation? Boomer also compared me to William Hung even though he’s never heard me sing.)
The boutique area was great and cheap. By the time we got there, things had been picked over, but I found and bought a shirt I found that had slipped off a hanger. “You don’t buy off the rack, you buy off the floor!” quipped Crabby.
The show was loud and wonderful. Mad violinist, flying monkey people on trapezes, chaps cut in interesting places, and great singers (especially Simone Denny and Patti laBelle). The only disappointment was Linda Evangelista, who looked lovely, but read a poorly written and short speech at the beginning.
Afterwards we got free blue cocktails in wee martini glasses, glow sticks and free Haagan Daas!
I don’t think I saw Mikevil. And I forgot the tiara on the way out the door, which I continued to moan about to poor Crabby who has to put up with me.
Thank you Crabby for inviting me and thank you Planet Aid for the $15 gown. And thank you B-girlz for not pulling me off the stage with a hook.
Mr. Crabby didn’t want to go to Fashion Cares after all so I got to go with Crabby!
I wore a silver floor length crochet dress (yes, it was lined.) Crabby wore a black Audrey Hepburn-eque sheath dress.
We drank Funkdeified martinis (weird name, but they are sort of like spiked ginger lemonade), I did Karaoke with the B-Girlz . I sang New York New York (there were only 4 choices I chose the one least sung just to get up there). I even had back-up singers and dancers. Afterwards, pink B-girl said I was very Bridget Jones.
I will take that as a compliment – goofy and hapless but charming nonetheless. They will be mailing me a DVD of my performance. I will post the file if I can and then you can download my mortification. And see the nice dress. (NOTE: Boomer just dropped by and said he could make copies of the DVD, so now I’ve decided to design a cover and sell them with proceeds going to my Pride Run fund. Why shouldn’t I/they profit from my humiliation? Boomer also compared me to William Hung even though he’s never heard me sing.)
The boutique area was great and cheap. By the time we got there, things had been picked over, but I found and bought a shirt I found that had slipped off a hanger. “You don’t buy off the rack, you buy off the floor!” quipped Crabby.
The show was loud and wonderful. Mad violinist, flying monkey people on trapezes, chaps cut in interesting places, and great singers (especially Simone Denny and Patti laBelle). The only disappointment was Linda Evangelista, who looked lovely, but read a poorly written and short speech at the beginning.
Afterwards we got free blue cocktails in wee martini glasses, glow sticks and free Haagan Daas!
I don’t think I saw Mikevil. And I forgot the tiara on the way out the door, which I continued to moan about to poor Crabby who has to put up with me.
Thank you Crabby for inviting me and thank you Planet Aid for the $15 gown. And thank you B-girlz for not pulling me off the stage with a hook.
Friday, May 28, 2004
Team Queen!
Here's a picture of the Pride and Remembrance Run Team we've assembled. That's Mikevil on the left.
Here's a picture of the Pride and Remembrance Run Team we've assembled. That's Mikevil on the left.
Thursday, May 27, 2004
Featured E-mail of the Day
Ice Queen,
We haven't seen you in a while... our records show that you last signed in to Tickle, formerly known as Emode, on February 22, 2001.
Because you haven't signed in or taken a test within the past year, your account has been marked as inactive. If it remains inactive for another 30 days, we'll need to delete it.
Tests Taken
Test Title Result Date Taken
What Breed of Dog Are You? Pug 01/31/01
The Passion Predictor: Snugglebunny 02/07/01
The Ultimate Personality Test: Movie Star 02/22/01
Which "Friend" Are You? Phoebe 03/12/01
SNUGGLEBUNNY?! Movie star I can believe.
Ice Queen,
We haven't seen you in a while... our records show that you last signed in to Tickle, formerly known as Emode, on February 22, 2001.
Because you haven't signed in or taken a test within the past year, your account has been marked as inactive. If it remains inactive for another 30 days, we'll need to delete it.
Tests Taken
Test Title Result Date Taken
What Breed of Dog Are You? Pug 01/31/01
The Passion Predictor: Snugglebunny 02/07/01
The Ultimate Personality Test: Movie Star 02/22/01
Which "Friend" Are You? Phoebe 03/12/01
SNUGGLEBUNNY?! Movie star I can believe.
Wednesday, May 26, 2004
An Act of Cod
Boomer has somehow managed to get me invited to create a name and a mandate for his team.
Here I have found a name generator. Here are a few of the cool names I think I may appropriate for other use.
GeoFist
ShirtSmash
LipBag
BurnBaby
HypnoFish
RiverCheese
DarkOompa
I also found this site very useful.
And then I found a mission statement generator.
Man, this facilitating stuff is a breeze. I think I’ll start up my own company. And call it “HypnoFish”! If you knew sushi like I know sushi… oh! Oh! Oh what a gal! Get hooked! Big fish, small pond. Brain food! Bare bones. Good creative is an Act of Cod. I'll just get back to work now......
Boomer has somehow managed to get me invited to create a name and a mandate for his team.
Here I have found a name generator. Here are a few of the cool names I think I may appropriate for other use.
GeoFist
ShirtSmash
LipBag
BurnBaby
HypnoFish
RiverCheese
DarkOompa
I also found this site very useful.
And then I found a mission statement generator.
Man, this facilitating stuff is a breeze. I think I’ll start up my own company. And call it “HypnoFish”! If you knew sushi like I know sushi… oh! Oh! Oh what a gal! Get hooked! Big fish, small pond. Brain food! Bare bones. Good creative is an Act of Cod. I'll just get back to work now......
Tuesday, May 25, 2004
Cheeky Bum Taster!
Ice Prince Quote Of The Weekend:
“I need the big blanket over me so Leo (our cat) doesn’t taste my bum.”
Saturday we went to the Jazz Festival. Ice Prince got to go on stage and play an instrument while the band played “Spiderman”. Then I couldn’t get him off the stage.
Sunday we went to buy shoes because the boy had huge holes in his sneakers. Ice Prince chose Spiderman sandals. Now he puts on his sandals and dances and sings the Spiderman song.
Monday we went to the zoo with the Crabbies. The best part was seeing the Otter Feeding. They were right in front of us – it was most excellent. Ice Prince would squeal everytime one swam by. "I liked the d'otters best!" Then the Crabbies came over for dinner. Fresh opened up his store of wine. Now I am a wee bit hung over. Bleagh.
I also had insomnia and got up at 4 am and watched the remake of Sabrina. Why does no one ever try to bribe me to move to Paris?
Ice Prince Quote Of The Weekend:
“I need the big blanket over me so Leo (our cat) doesn’t taste my bum.”
Saturday we went to the Jazz Festival. Ice Prince got to go on stage and play an instrument while the band played “Spiderman”. Then I couldn’t get him off the stage.
Sunday we went to buy shoes because the boy had huge holes in his sneakers. Ice Prince chose Spiderman sandals. Now he puts on his sandals and dances and sings the Spiderman song.
Monday we went to the zoo with the Crabbies. The best part was seeing the Otter Feeding. They were right in front of us – it was most excellent. Ice Prince would squeal everytime one swam by. "I liked the d'otters best!" Then the Crabbies came over for dinner. Fresh opened up his store of wine. Now I am a wee bit hung over. Bleagh.
I also had insomnia and got up at 4 am and watched the remake of Sabrina. Why does no one ever try to bribe me to move to Paris?
Friday, May 21, 2004
All Boomer, All Day
So Boomer was just here giving me work (he can't really do that, so he tries to make it sound like something I'd enjoy to muster my enthusiasm.) I have to help his team come up with a name. I suggested "Chips and Dips" from an old Dilbert cartoon. Then I tried using google to find that cartoon. I failed, but took this Quizilla test instead:
You are Ratbert.
Your goal is to make people love you, but you only
succeed in making a fool of yourself as you
try. You're the butt of everbody's joke, but
that's ok : you can take it and still be
cheery.
Which Dilbert character are you ?
brought to you by Quizilla
So Boomer was just here giving me work (he can't really do that, so he tries to make it sound like something I'd enjoy to muster my enthusiasm.) I have to help his team come up with a name. I suggested "Chips and Dips" from an old Dilbert cartoon. Then I tried using google to find that cartoon. I failed, but took this Quizilla test instead:
You are Ratbert.
Your goal is to make people love you, but you only
succeed in making a fool of yourself as you
try. You're the butt of everbody's joke, but
that's ok : you can take it and still be
cheery.
Which Dilbert character are you ?
brought to you by Quizilla
Let Boomer Appreciation Day Begin!
The Naming of Boomer
Before I started my blog, I used to e-mail my strange ramblings to Boomer. I often had a question of the day. The first one was “Where do the TNT men keep their loose change?” and the second one was “Do male kangaroos have pockets?”
During research on male kangaroo, I discovered a young male kangaroo is called a boomer — and a legend was born. He’s been Boomer ever since.
Boomer’s Best Quote
“Half pints? They have half pints? That’s just wrong.”
More later. And I'll see if I can talk him into a photo.....
The Naming of Boomer
Before I started my blog, I used to e-mail my strange ramblings to Boomer. I often had a question of the day. The first one was “Where do the TNT men keep their loose change?” and the second one was “Do male kangaroos have pockets?”
During research on male kangaroo, I discovered a young male kangaroo is called a boomer — and a legend was born. He’s been Boomer ever since.
Boomer’s Best Quote
“Half pints? They have half pints? That’s just wrong.”
More later. And I'll see if I can talk him into a photo.....
Thursday, May 20, 2004
Put Your Money Where Your Mouse Is
I have received my first online pledge — from Boomer. Thank you! Excellent timing, considering I have some photos of you that I could post now that I have image ability.
Instead, I hereby declare Friday May 21st as Boomer Appreciation Day in the Fief. Drop by to learn where Boomer got his name and more!
Donate today. You too can be an athletic supporter!
I have received my first online pledge — from Boomer. Thank you! Excellent timing, considering I have some photos of you that I could post now that I have image ability.
Instead, I hereby declare Friday May 21st as Boomer Appreciation Day in the Fief. Drop by to learn where Boomer got his name and more!
Donate today. You too can be an athletic supporter!
Wednesday, May 19, 2004
Bits and Bites
1. No one has sponsored me in the run yet. However, Sir Snobby has placed a link on his blog to my online donation page. The Queen is pleased and smiles benevolently upon him.
2. The Queen is sorry that her great beauty has driven Outlaw to distraction. If he had seen me with greasy hair and Drew Carey glasses scrubbing the basement toilet last night , he'd probably change his tune. Please keep your worship to a dull roar so as not to creep out our other royal subjects. And me.
3. Keith Richards has signed on to be Captain Jack Sparrow's (Johnny Depp's) dad in the next Pirates movie, savvy? Most excellent.
4. Shrek 2 has gotten amazing reviews and I am therefore taking Ice Prince to see his very first big screen movie, probably next weekend. Wish me luck. My first one was Snow White and it still scares the hell out of me just thinking about it.
5. This is my last weekend (partial) with Fresh before the election starts (Fresh works for an MP, so he'll be busy every waking hour.)It's going to be a long June.
6. Gotta run. I got new software and am laying out a newsletter. Such fun! The fonts! The graphics! The leading! (No sarcasm. I love that stuff.)
1. No one has sponsored me in the run yet. However, Sir Snobby has placed a link on his blog to my online donation page. The Queen is pleased and smiles benevolently upon him.
2. The Queen is sorry that her great beauty has driven Outlaw to distraction. If he had seen me with greasy hair and Drew Carey glasses scrubbing the basement toilet last night , he'd probably change his tune. Please keep your worship to a dull roar so as not to creep out our other royal subjects. And me.
3. Keith Richards has signed on to be Captain Jack Sparrow's (Johnny Depp's) dad in the next Pirates movie, savvy? Most excellent.
4. Shrek 2 has gotten amazing reviews and I am therefore taking Ice Prince to see his very first big screen movie, probably next weekend. Wish me luck. My first one was Snow White and it still scares the hell out of me just thinking about it.
5. This is my last weekend (partial) with Fresh before the election starts (Fresh works for an MP, so he'll be busy every waking hour.)It's going to be a long June.
6. Gotta run. I got new software and am laying out a newsletter. Such fun! The fonts! The graphics! The leading! (No sarcasm. I love that stuff.)
Tuesday, May 18, 2004
Get Me To The Church On Time
Same sex marriage law causes rush to Massachusetts city halls.
Trivia note: As a wee icicle, the Ice Queen used to (not on purpose)pronounce it Massa-two-shits, much to her parents' amusement.
Same sex marriage law causes rush to Massachusetts city halls.
Trivia note: As a wee icicle, the Ice Queen used to (not on purpose)pronounce it Massa-two-shits, much to her parents' amusement.
Monday, May 17, 2004
Ahem!
You know, I’ve been getting a lot of sass from the peasants lately. I’m not exactly sure that I am being shown my Queenly reverence and deference.
Therefore I am asking you, my subjects, to write me a song of praise – the new National Anthem for the Icicle Fief. Now, I realize that you are not as talented as I am (or as good looking or as modest), so I provide here the lyrics of an existing Queen Anthem for your use. (Or you could use a Queen song, like Killer Queen, although anyone who attempts to use Fat Bottomed Girls gets exiled. No ifs, ands or butts. I mean buts.)
I await your adoration with bated breath. (If I’d had anchovies last night I would be waiting with baited breath.)
National Anthem
God save our gracious Queen
Long live our noble Queen
God save our Queen!
Send her victorious,
Happy and glorious
Long to reign over us,
God save the Queen!
*
O Lord our God arise,
Scatter her enemies,
And make them fall:
Confound their politics;
Frustrate their knavish tricks;
ON thee our hopes we fix; God save us all.
*
Thy choicest gifts in store
ON her be pleased to pour,
Long may she reign!
May she defend our laws,
And ever give us cause,
To sing with heart and voice,
God save the Queen!
You know, I’ve been getting a lot of sass from the peasants lately. I’m not exactly sure that I am being shown my Queenly reverence and deference.
Therefore I am asking you, my subjects, to write me a song of praise – the new National Anthem for the Icicle Fief. Now, I realize that you are not as talented as I am (or as good looking or as modest), so I provide here the lyrics of an existing Queen Anthem for your use. (Or you could use a Queen song, like Killer Queen, although anyone who attempts to use Fat Bottomed Girls gets exiled. No ifs, ands or butts. I mean buts.)
I await your adoration with bated breath. (If I’d had anchovies last night I would be waiting with baited breath.)
National Anthem
God save our gracious Queen
Long live our noble Queen
God save our Queen!
Send her victorious,
Happy and glorious
Long to reign over us,
God save the Queen!
*
O Lord our God arise,
Scatter her enemies,
And make them fall:
Confound their politics;
Frustrate their knavish tricks;
ON thee our hopes we fix; God save us all.
*
Thy choicest gifts in store
ON her be pleased to pour,
Long may she reign!
May she defend our laws,
And ever give us cause,
To sing with heart and voice,
God save the Queen!
Insert Witty Post Title Here
Bad, bad, bad weekend.
Ice Prince got sent to his room at least 7 times yesterday. He was totally mouthing off and laughing at my attempts at discipline. The last time he got sent to his room he fell asleep. Today’s he’s much better, so I hope he learned something. “Make sure the good books and toys are in your room BEFORE you piss Mom off.”
But the weekend was saved at the last minute by the Freddie Mercury tribute on Much More Music. I get goosebumps! This also made me want to do karaoke. Another fundraising idea? Maybe I could win a gift certificate for fundraising and finally by some decent running shoes. Of course, by then, I won’t need the shoes.
I took my bike out for the first time in a year. Sweet glorious freedom! And today at lunch, I run.
I will be setting up a progress chart (or as I like to call it “The Wall of Shame”) to monitor my training progress for the Pride Run. I also thought that if I run out of steam out, Mikevil could pull me in one of those rickshaw things and I could throw condoms branded with the Ice Queen logo. “I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream With Ice Queen Brand Condoms!”
Bad, bad, bad weekend.
Ice Prince got sent to his room at least 7 times yesterday. He was totally mouthing off and laughing at my attempts at discipline. The last time he got sent to his room he fell asleep. Today’s he’s much better, so I hope he learned something. “Make sure the good books and toys are in your room BEFORE you piss Mom off.”
But the weekend was saved at the last minute by the Freddie Mercury tribute on Much More Music. I get goosebumps! This also made me want to do karaoke. Another fundraising idea? Maybe I could win a gift certificate for fundraising and finally by some decent running shoes. Of course, by then, I won’t need the shoes.
I took my bike out for the first time in a year. Sweet glorious freedom! And today at lunch, I run.
I will be setting up a progress chart (or as I like to call it “The Wall of Shame”) to monitor my training progress for the Pride Run. I also thought that if I run out of steam out, Mikevil could pull me in one of those rickshaw things and I could throw condoms branded with the Ice Queen logo. “I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream With Ice Queen Brand Condoms!”
Friday, May 14, 2004
I'm All That And A Bag Of Chips
Magister Mundi sum!
"I am the Master of the Universe!"
You are full of yourself, but you're so cool you
probably deserve to be. Rock on.
Which Weird Latin Phrase Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
Magister Mundi sum!
"I am the Master of the Universe!"
You are full of yourself, but you're so cool you
probably deserve to be. Rock on.
Which Weird Latin Phrase Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
Thursday, May 13, 2004
Our Team By Any Other Name Would Not Smell As Sweet, Although From the Sound of His Blog, Neither Will Mikevil Once He Starts Running and Sweating
Mikevil has not yet responded on whether we can call our Pride Run Team: Team Queen. The only other name I will consider is The Moe Szyslak Experience featuring The Ice Queen.
Captain Consumer
At lunchtime I walked down to Planet Aid and bought:
Fushia skirt
Fushia top
Pale Pink Top
Pale Pink Suedette Jacket (Retro –from the 60s)
It’s much better than it sounds.
Ice Queen Predicts the Future
On the way down Yonge Street, there was a mad fellow behind me muttering “Fing this and f’ing that. Smash Everything. Smash!” So being the good Torontonian I am, I carefully let him pass, without making him notice that I was trying to avoid him “Hmmm,” thought I, “He seemed kinda violent. It’s a wonder you never hear about people like that attacking someone.”
Two blocks later, the police were handcuffing him, while a young man seemed to be explaining what happened to the police. He looked shaken, but not hurt.
And Because We Have New Readers
A Rerun of one of last summer’s Greatest Ice Queen Hits:
Hot town, summer in the city
Back on Spadina getting dirty and gritty
Flute guy, isn't it a pity
Doesn't seem to be a shadow in the city
All around, ducks looking half dead
Walking on the sidewalk, slimy like a fish head
But at noon the girls will come
Go out and eat dim sum
"Come on bring that cart o'er here
Chicken feet? Keep going, dear."
And babe, don't you know it's a pity
The shoes only come in size 5
In the summer, on Spadina
In the summer, on Spadina
Cool town, girls in the city
Dressing so fine and looking so pretty
Pokemon and Hello Kitty
Seems they're in every corner of the city
Till I'm wheezing like a bus stop
Running up the stairs, gonna eat and then shop
And babe, don't you know it's a pity
The shoes only come in size 5
In the summer, on Spadina
In the summer, on Spadina
Mikevil has not yet responded on whether we can call our Pride Run Team: Team Queen. The only other name I will consider is The Moe Szyslak Experience featuring The Ice Queen.
Captain Consumer
At lunchtime I walked down to Planet Aid and bought:
Fushia skirt
Fushia top
Pale Pink Top
Pale Pink Suedette Jacket (Retro –from the 60s)
It’s much better than it sounds.
Ice Queen Predicts the Future
On the way down Yonge Street, there was a mad fellow behind me muttering “Fing this and f’ing that. Smash Everything. Smash!” So being the good Torontonian I am, I carefully let him pass, without making him notice that I was trying to avoid him “Hmmm,” thought I, “He seemed kinda violent. It’s a wonder you never hear about people like that attacking someone.”
Two blocks later, the police were handcuffing him, while a young man seemed to be explaining what happened to the police. He looked shaken, but not hurt.
And Because We Have New Readers
A Rerun of one of last summer’s Greatest Ice Queen Hits:
Hot town, summer in the city
Back on Spadina getting dirty and gritty
Flute guy, isn't it a pity
Doesn't seem to be a shadow in the city
All around, ducks looking half dead
Walking on the sidewalk, slimy like a fish head
But at noon the girls will come
Go out and eat dim sum
"Come on bring that cart o'er here
Chicken feet? Keep going, dear."
And babe, don't you know it's a pity
The shoes only come in size 5
In the summer, on Spadina
In the summer, on Spadina
Cool town, girls in the city
Dressing so fine and looking so pretty
Pokemon and Hello Kitty
Seems they're in every corner of the city
Till I'm wheezing like a bus stop
Running up the stairs, gonna eat and then shop
And babe, don't you know it's a pity
The shoes only come in size 5
In the summer, on Spadina
In the summer, on Spadina
Wednesday, May 12, 2004
True. So true.
I don't know if any of you have been reading Dooce, but she just had a baby a couple of months ago.
Her posts are amazing. And despite the fact that I feel the same way, it's good to know I'm not alone. (Although I am back at work now, it doesn't get much better. I just can't hear the screaming from here. Which is nice.)
Check her out and discover the dark recesses of the Ice Queen's mind.
I don't know if any of you have been reading Dooce, but she just had a baby a couple of months ago.
Her posts are amazing. And despite the fact that I feel the same way, it's good to know I'm not alone. (Although I am back at work now, it doesn't get much better. I just can't hear the screaming from here. Which is nice.)
Check her out and discover the dark recesses of the Ice Queen's mind.
Tuesday, May 11, 2004
Sun Comes Up It’s Tuesday Morning
Coffee break with the Ice Queen
Tried Spray On Pantyhose at Shoppers Drug Mart. Sprayed a spot on my shin. It looks like I have a bruise.
And I Ran…Ran So Far Away...Couldn’t Get Away
So today I begin my training for the Pride and Remembrance Run. We’ll see how far I can go by June 26th.
I figure if I run 2 km four times a week, by June 26th…..I’ll be in Guelph.
I think I should have a Meet the Ice Queen and Give Her a Pledge drinking night before that. Who’s in?
I shall be running in my tiara. For extravagant donations, I will accept other suggestions for my running costume. Not sure the red cross eye patch is a good idea…. I already have someone offer to donate their medal from a previous run, so that’s good.
Boomer has been appointed official Photographer to the Queen. Other Royal Staff are welcome to apply for positions such as Water Boy, Purse Holder, Makeup Touch Ups, etc…..
Such fun! What next? Oh yes, I’ll need a running soundtrack. Suggestions welcome.
Coffee break with the Ice Queen
Tried Spray On Pantyhose at Shoppers Drug Mart. Sprayed a spot on my shin. It looks like I have a bruise.
And I Ran…Ran So Far Away...Couldn’t Get Away
So today I begin my training for the Pride and Remembrance Run. We’ll see how far I can go by June 26th.
I figure if I run 2 km four times a week, by June 26th…..I’ll be in Guelph.
I think I should have a Meet the Ice Queen and Give Her a Pledge drinking night before that. Who’s in?
I shall be running in my tiara. For extravagant donations, I will accept other suggestions for my running costume. Not sure the red cross eye patch is a good idea…. I already have someone offer to donate their medal from a previous run, so that’s good.
Boomer has been appointed official Photographer to the Queen. Other Royal Staff are welcome to apply for positions such as Water Boy, Purse Holder, Makeup Touch Ups, etc…..
Such fun! What next? Oh yes, I’ll need a running soundtrack. Suggestions welcome.
Monday, May 10, 2004
And Then I Put on the Nurse Uniform….
How’d I do on my Mother’s Day Wish List? Let’s see:
1. The book Three Martini Playdate (no, but I started reading The Stonecarvers)
2. Lingerie, nylons and other flimsies (no, it was BYOflimsies)
3. Wine. (yep!)
4. Take in food (no, but Fresh cooked pasta with scallops)
5. A long bath that doesn't involve ducks or boats. (done!)
6. Tulips or any flowers but carnations (yes)
7. No tantrums (not too bad…)
8. Sunshine (some)
9. Any Bloom County books I don't already own (nope)
10. Bagels (yes!)
Ice Prince was not happy about Mother’s Day at first: “I don’t want it to be Mother’s Day. I want Mommy to make me pancakes!” But eventually he got into it. He made me wear the "Mother's Day Princess" outfit which consisted of a headband with bouncing antennae and a pink lei.
And Fresh rented a movie I wanted to see: Kill Bill Vol. 1. Not bad. I give it full bonus marks for using Zamfir on the soundtrack who, I believe, is totally underrated.
Nothing says; “You’re a great mom” like watching people get their limbs and heads chopped off.
How’d I do on my Mother’s Day Wish List? Let’s see:
1. The book Three Martini Playdate (no, but I started reading The Stonecarvers)
2. Lingerie, nylons and other flimsies (no, it was BYOflimsies)
3. Wine. (yep!)
4. Take in food (no, but Fresh cooked pasta with scallops)
5. A long bath that doesn't involve ducks or boats. (done!)
6. Tulips or any flowers but carnations (yes)
7. No tantrums (not too bad…)
8. Sunshine (some)
9. Any Bloom County books I don't already own (nope)
10. Bagels (yes!)
Ice Prince was not happy about Mother’s Day at first: “I don’t want it to be Mother’s Day. I want Mommy to make me pancakes!” But eventually he got into it. He made me wear the "Mother's Day Princess" outfit which consisted of a headband with bouncing antennae and a pink lei.
And Fresh rented a movie I wanted to see: Kill Bill Vol. 1. Not bad. I give it full bonus marks for using Zamfir on the soundtrack who, I believe, is totally underrated.
Nothing says; “You’re a great mom” like watching people get their limbs and heads chopped off.
Friday, May 07, 2004
A Woman of Mystery
If you haven’t been over to Crabby’s Place and wandered around, you may not have seen this picture of me. It’s your Friday present from Crabby. Enjoy.
Ice Queen's Most Excellent Question of the Day
So I was watching a Shrek 2 commercial last night, when I turned to look at my cat. "If he were in a movie,"I thought, I wonder who would do his voice?"
So there is your challenge for the day. Think about your pet's personality and what would his voice sound like? Tell me who would play him and/or her and why.
My cats:
Leo will be played by Denzel Washington. Handsome, black, suave. Rrrrroooowwwrrr!
Mel will be played by Estelle Getty as on Golden Girls. Old and grumpy, but still somehow lovable (just.)
So I was watching a Shrek 2 commercial last night, when I turned to look at my cat. "If he were in a movie,"I thought, I wonder who would do his voice?"
So there is your challenge for the day. Think about your pet's personality and what would his voice sound like? Tell me who would play him and/or her and why.
My cats:
Leo will be played by Denzel Washington. Handsome, black, suave. Rrrrroooowwwrrr!
Mel will be played by Estelle Getty as on Golden Girls. Old and grumpy, but still somehow lovable (just.)
Thursday, May 06, 2004
It's MY day, dammit!
Mother's Day is a very important occassion to me because I have earned it.
Boy, have I earned it.
What do I want for Mother's Day? Thank you, dear reader, for inquiring.
1. The book Three Martini Playdate
2. Lingerie, nylons and other flimsies
3. Wine.
4. Take in food
5. A long bath that doesn't involve ducks or boats.
6. Tulips or any flowers but carnations
7. No tantrums
8. Sunshine
9. Any Bloom County books I don't already own
10. Bagels
Mother's Day is a very important occassion to me because I have earned it.
Boy, have I earned it.
What do I want for Mother's Day? Thank you, dear reader, for inquiring.
1. The book Three Martini Playdate
2. Lingerie, nylons and other flimsies
3. Wine.
4. Take in food
5. A long bath that doesn't involve ducks or boats.
6. Tulips or any flowers but carnations
7. No tantrums
8. Sunshine
9. Any Bloom County books I don't already own
10. Bagels
Quit Bitching and Eat the Smoothie
So Friends is ending tonight. Fresh is out, so I’m going to watch it. (Fresh doesn’t appreciate the less edifying aspects of life, and yet he enjoys Chris Farley crashing through tables. But I digress.)
I find the finale sad, because I too had a close circle of friends and we’ve all gone our separate ways. Sure, Sister Staceypatrick actually works at the same company as me (I can’t seem to shake her), but everyone else has gone. One got married last fall (not to Sister Stace as had been the plan back then) and e-mailed me the photo. Two moved to Vancouver and still appear to be working in retail. One went off to become a minister and seems to have lost his faith. Now he won’t return my e-mails. Maybe I remind him of things he’d rather not remember? It’s sad. Hell, I’ll e-mail him this url again and see if he responds. And then the inevitable sexual tension, which was never acted upon (okay once, but I won’t mention names here.)
In fact Sister Staceypatrick wrote the precursor to Friends. It was called Roomies and it was written in my dorm room on a typewriter in 1987. Sweetie, I think you should sue. I still have the manuscript….
As I get older, I find it harder to make new friends. But I did find Crabby and Mr. Crab, so I am grateful for that. And who knows? I may meet some of my Toronto readers someday and start up a friendship (Or maybe a dating service…I seem to be gathering readers of a certain gender and persuasion, was it something I said? If so, I'll say it again!)
So Friends is ending tonight. Fresh is out, so I’m going to watch it. (Fresh doesn’t appreciate the less edifying aspects of life, and yet he enjoys Chris Farley crashing through tables. But I digress.)
I find the finale sad, because I too had a close circle of friends and we’ve all gone our separate ways. Sure, Sister Staceypatrick actually works at the same company as me (I can’t seem to shake her), but everyone else has gone. One got married last fall (not to Sister Stace as had been the plan back then) and e-mailed me the photo. Two moved to Vancouver and still appear to be working in retail. One went off to become a minister and seems to have lost his faith. Now he won’t return my e-mails. Maybe I remind him of things he’d rather not remember? It’s sad. Hell, I’ll e-mail him this url again and see if he responds. And then the inevitable sexual tension, which was never acted upon (okay once, but I won’t mention names here.)
In fact Sister Staceypatrick wrote the precursor to Friends. It was called Roomies and it was written in my dorm room on a typewriter in 1987. Sweetie, I think you should sue. I still have the manuscript….
As I get older, I find it harder to make new friends. But I did find Crabby and Mr. Crab, so I am grateful for that. And who knows? I may meet some of my Toronto readers someday and start up a friendship (Or maybe a dating service…I seem to be gathering readers of a certain gender and persuasion, was it something I said? If so, I'll say it again!)
Wednesday, May 05, 2004
How rude of me. Let’s do some introductions.
We’ve got a lot of new readers, so I thought I would introduce some of the common characters who appear here in the Icicle Fief. The Royal Court, as it were.
Cast of Characters:
Fresh: The Ice Queen’s consort. He is the yin to my yang, the chocolate in my peanut butter, the wind beneath my wings. His hobbies include reading The Globe and Mail, desserts and listening to the CBC.
The Ice Prince, Age 3 ¼: Son of Ice Queen and Fresh. Hobbies include showing his belly, singing on the bus and flushing things down the toilet.
Crabby: Classy broad, grammarian, sometime poet, sometime blogger, great cook. Plus we’re the same shoe size, bonus! Ice Prince loves her:“But she’s not my girlfriend. Ellen is.”
Mr. Crabby: Crabby’s husband. I prefer to call him Mr. Crab because it reminds me of Mr. Krabs in Spongebob Squarepants.
Sister Staceypatrick: Thespian, fellow Bank employee, Ice Queen’s oldest friend from university. Enjoys long walks along the Beach and saying “Bite me!”
Father Patrick O’ Stacey: Sister’s husband
Boomer: Works in same department as Ice Queen and keeps her sane by encouraging her insanity. Enjoys brunch, beer and cute wait staff, not necessarily in that order.
Beco:Used to work with the Ice Queen, now works on the floor below. Moving to Oakville momentarily where the 2.3 children will soon follow. The Queen sends her condolences.
Those are the people I know in real life. I expect to probably meet Mikevil one of these days, since we do work for the same behemoth.
If anyone would like to be added to the Cast of Characters, let me know and send a description.
We’ve got a lot of new readers, so I thought I would introduce some of the common characters who appear here in the Icicle Fief. The Royal Court, as it were.
Cast of Characters:
Fresh: The Ice Queen’s consort. He is the yin to my yang, the chocolate in my peanut butter, the wind beneath my wings. His hobbies include reading The Globe and Mail, desserts and listening to the CBC.
The Ice Prince, Age 3 ¼: Son of Ice Queen and Fresh. Hobbies include showing his belly, singing on the bus and flushing things down the toilet.
Crabby: Classy broad, grammarian, sometime poet, sometime blogger, great cook. Plus we’re the same shoe size, bonus! Ice Prince loves her:“But she’s not my girlfriend. Ellen is.”
Mr. Crabby: Crabby’s husband. I prefer to call him Mr. Crab because it reminds me of Mr. Krabs in Spongebob Squarepants.
Sister Staceypatrick: Thespian, fellow Bank employee, Ice Queen’s oldest friend from university. Enjoys long walks along the Beach and saying “Bite me!”
Father Patrick O’ Stacey: Sister’s husband
Boomer: Works in same department as Ice Queen and keeps her sane by encouraging her insanity. Enjoys brunch, beer and cute wait staff, not necessarily in that order.
Beco:Used to work with the Ice Queen, now works on the floor below. Moving to Oakville momentarily where the 2.3 children will soon follow. The Queen sends her condolences.
Those are the people I know in real life. I expect to probably meet Mikevil one of these days, since we do work for the same behemoth.
If anyone would like to be added to the Cast of Characters, let me know and send a description.
Tuesday, May 04, 2004
Let Them Drink Squishies!
The peasants are revolting at being unable to meet my exacting standards for pop culture knowledge.
Fine.
I will give you bonus points for answering the following questions.
1. Who is your favourite Simpsons character?
2. What is your favourite Simpsons quote?
3. What is your favourite Simpsons episode?
4. Who on the Simpsons would be your dream date?
The peasants are revolting at being unable to meet my exacting standards for pop culture knowledge.
Fine.
I will give you bonus points for answering the following questions.
1. Who is your favourite Simpsons character?
2. What is your favourite Simpsons quote?
3. What is your favourite Simpsons episode?
4. Who on the Simpsons would be your dream date?
There But For The Grace Of God Go I
I was doing exactly this with the Ice Prince last Thursday.
Anyone got any bail?
I was doing exactly this with the Ice Prince last Thursday.
Anyone got any bail?
The Ice Prince Answers Your Questions
1)What do you want to be when you grow up? ”Teacher! And drive a bus to school.”
2)It's almost summer: What are you going to do this summer? “After summer I get to go to the big kid school.”
3)Do you prefer popsicles or ice cream cones? “Popsicles! Can we have Popsicles? Pleeeeeeeease?” (Thanks a lot, Eva.)
1)What is your favourite song? “ABCD”
2)What is mommy doing while you are at daycare? “She goes on the computer. She reads stories.” (The answer a couple of weeks ago was “She dances for videos.”)
3)How old is mommy? (I'm expecting something good here..) “Four.”
1. What is your favorite cartoon show or character? “Dora.” (That’s Dora The Explorer)
2. What is your favorite thing to play with or about outside? “My wagon”
3. What is your favorite jungle animal? “Cow.”
1)What do you want to be when you grow up? ”Teacher! And drive a bus to school.”
2)It's almost summer: What are you going to do this summer? “After summer I get to go to the big kid school.”
3)Do you prefer popsicles or ice cream cones? “Popsicles! Can we have Popsicles? Pleeeeeeeease?” (Thanks a lot, Eva.)
1)What is your favourite song? “ABCD”
2)What is mommy doing while you are at daycare? “She goes on the computer. She reads stories.” (The answer a couple of weeks ago was “She dances for videos.”)
3)How old is mommy? (I'm expecting something good here..) “Four.”
1. What is your favorite cartoon show or character? “Dora.” (That’s Dora The Explorer)
2. What is your favorite thing to play with or about outside? “My wagon”
3. What is your favorite jungle animal? “Cow.”
Monday, May 03, 2004
A Picasso or a Garfunkel
Friday, Crabby came over (Father P O’S had to cancel.) We ate and drank and Ice Prince answered Snobby’s questions:
How old are you?
(IP holds up three fingers)
What’s your favourite thing to do?
(IP pulls up his shirt and shows us his belly. Crabby and I break up laughing.)
What’s your favourite food?
“Rice!”
I will ask Ice Prince your other questions tonight.
Saturday Ice Prince reluctantly got a hair cut. “My head fell off, “ he reported to his Nana afterwards. We had lamb burgers for dinner (“Liiiiiissssaaa…why do you haaaaaaate me?” If you don’t know the reference, you probably shouldn’t be reading this blog. If you know where this post title came, you may stay for now. I’m not afraid to give homework if anyone needs to catch up.)
Sunday Fresh and I become Patrons of the Arts. We bought a painting at the Beaches Studio Tour for over our fireplace. It’s sort of an abstracty landscape. Very vibrant. If you ever become famous, I’ll invite you over and show it to you. Bring wine.
Friday, Crabby came over (Father P O’S had to cancel.) We ate and drank and Ice Prince answered Snobby’s questions:
How old are you?
(IP holds up three fingers)
What’s your favourite thing to do?
(IP pulls up his shirt and shows us his belly. Crabby and I break up laughing.)
What’s your favourite food?
“Rice!”
I will ask Ice Prince your other questions tonight.
Saturday Ice Prince reluctantly got a hair cut. “My head fell off, “ he reported to his Nana afterwards. We had lamb burgers for dinner (“Liiiiiissssaaa…why do you haaaaaaate me?” If you don’t know the reference, you probably shouldn’t be reading this blog. If you know where this post title came, you may stay for now. I’m not afraid to give homework if anyone needs to catch up.)
Sunday Fresh and I become Patrons of the Arts. We bought a painting at the Beaches Studio Tour for over our fireplace. It’s sort of an abstracty landscape. Very vibrant. If you ever become famous, I’ll invite you over and show it to you. Bring wine.
Friday, April 30, 2004
Thanks for the Meme-ories
Oh, I was going to post the same meme as Radmila, Lily and Snobby, but you know what? I don't feel like it.
Instead of asking ME three questions, I want you to ask The Ice Prince three questions. I will ask him for you and report the answers back.
Won't that be fun? Wheeeeee! (Crabby gets to ask her three questions in person tonight.)
Oh, I was going to post the same meme as Radmila, Lily and Snobby, but you know what? I don't feel like it.
Instead of asking ME three questions, I want you to ask The Ice Prince three questions. I will ask him for you and report the answers back.
Won't that be fun? Wheeeeee! (Crabby gets to ask her three questions in person tonight.)
A Taxing Day
Finished the taxes today (after finding all of the obscure codes and the elusive “line 150” required). Fresh and I pretty much break even between the two of us. Eh, could be worse. Glad it’s finished, though.
Ice Prince is in a royally bad mood. But he did come up with one social comment this morning:
IP: “Boys have bags.”
Me: “Huh?” (worried this may be a rude comment)
IP: “Boys have bags, Mommy, and girls have purses, right?”
Me: “Oh, uh, right. Usually.”
Interesting that a 3 year old noticed that distinction. He didn’t learn it from me – I let him carry around the gold lamé purse his Nana gave him for his birthday while wearing my high heels.
Tonight we’re having Crabby and Father Patrick O’Stacey over for supper. It’s weird having each without their spouse. It’s like having Fred and Betty over. Or Wilma and Barney. Anyhow, we’re having Queer Eye Ted’s Rack of Lamb. And I’m making lentils for the first time ever, simmered in lamb stock with shallots.
It’s so nice to have an edible hobby.
Finished the taxes today (after finding all of the obscure codes and the elusive “line 150” required). Fresh and I pretty much break even between the two of us. Eh, could be worse. Glad it’s finished, though.
Ice Prince is in a royally bad mood. But he did come up with one social comment this morning:
IP: “Boys have bags.”
Me: “Huh?” (worried this may be a rude comment)
IP: “Boys have bags, Mommy, and girls have purses, right?”
Me: “Oh, uh, right. Usually.”
Interesting that a 3 year old noticed that distinction. He didn’t learn it from me – I let him carry around the gold lamé purse his Nana gave him for his birthday while wearing my high heels.
Tonight we’re having Crabby and Father Patrick O’Stacey over for supper. It’s weird having each without their spouse. It’s like having Fred and Betty over. Or Wilma and Barney. Anyhow, we’re having Queer Eye Ted’s Rack of Lamb. And I’m making lentils for the first time ever, simmered in lamb stock with shallots.
It’s so nice to have an edible hobby.
Tuesday, April 27, 2004
Lily's meme rules get me confused. Therefore it's....
Boomer's Questions of the Day!
1. If you were a stripper, what three songs would you choose?
2. And what would your "theme look" be?
Okay, for me, the three songs are:
Laid, by James
I Want you Back by INX and
Disease by Matchbox 20
My persona would be Naughty Librarian.
And you?
Boomer's Questions of the Day!
1. If you were a stripper, what three songs would you choose?
2. And what would your "theme look" be?
Okay, for me, the three songs are:
Laid, by James
I Want you Back by INX and
Disease by Matchbox 20
My persona would be Naughty Librarian.
And you?
Final Test – NOT!
So I had the exercise test yesterday (in a skirt and nylons, but I had shorts under the skirt and sneakers on). My lungs are fine, but I have Arrhythmia. That means my heart has extra beats. Probably nothing to worry about, but I’m being sent to a Cardiologist, getting an echocardiogram and have to wear a heart monitor for 24-48 hours. Arrhythmia can cause tiredness, dizziness and chest pain – sort of like pneumonia. Huh! Go figure. (But yes, I did really have pneumonia)
Am I worried? As long as I’m not pregnant, I really don’t care what they find.
So I had the exercise test yesterday (in a skirt and nylons, but I had shorts under the skirt and sneakers on). My lungs are fine, but I have Arrhythmia. That means my heart has extra beats. Probably nothing to worry about, but I’m being sent to a Cardiologist, getting an echocardiogram and have to wear a heart monitor for 24-48 hours. Arrhythmia can cause tiredness, dizziness and chest pain – sort of like pneumonia. Huh! Go figure. (But yes, I did really have pneumonia)
Am I worried? As long as I’m not pregnant, I really don’t care what they find.
Be A Chip Off The Old Block
Okay, my computer at home crashed, but here is what is there so far in the new Ice Queen Store.
Yeah, it's pricey, especially shipping to Canada. But one has to start somewhere.
Enjoy!
Okay, my computer at home crashed, but here is what is there so far in the new Ice Queen Store.
Yeah, it's pricey, especially shipping to Canada. But one has to start somewhere.
Enjoy!
Monday, April 26, 2004
The World Needs More Ice Queen
Eva did it.
Radmila did it.
Now it's time for Ice Queen Merchandise!
What would you like to buy with a spiffy new Ice Queen Logo on it? I'll probably set up the store at home tonight, but I'll take any requests.
I think you'll like the branding. Très chic. Très fierce. Très moi. Watch for it, tomorrow!
Eva did it.
Radmila did it.
Now it's time for Ice Queen Merchandise!
What would you like to buy with a spiffy new Ice Queen Logo on it? I'll probably set up the store at home tonight, but I'll take any requests.
I think you'll like the branding. Très chic. Très fierce. Très moi. Watch for it, tomorrow!
True Stories
The Players:
Blambdad: Blamb’s dad. Taught at same high School as my Dad. Taught me geography (or tried to, anyway).
My Dad. Can’t give him a cute nickname like my mom (Queen Mum), because if a Queen’s Dad were still alive, he’d be King and she’d only be a princess. Unless he abdicated or was a stepdad (Queen Mom’s consort). You see the dilemma?
The Setting:
An auction in or around Glencoe. Auctions out in the country are like garage sales in the city only bigger.
Blambdad: “Hey Peter, good to see you. How’s the Ice Queen doing?”
My father is stunned into silence. Is Blambdad talking about his wife? His boss? Who? And using a mean nickname for someone is pretty out of character for Blambdad.
Well, they eventually straightened it out.
Okay, maybe it wasn’t the best story. I’ll try harder.
In other news, Ice Prince and I made waffles for Fresh’s birthday breakfast yesterday.
“WE MADE YOU PARTY WAFFLES, DADDY!”
We also made an Angel Food Cake. Ice Prince covered it with a tea towel in the morning.
“I will put a blanket over it so I won’t eat it all and I won’t get a tummy ache.” My son, the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal.
The Players:
Blambdad: Blamb’s dad. Taught at same high School as my Dad. Taught me geography (or tried to, anyway).
My Dad. Can’t give him a cute nickname like my mom (Queen Mum), because if a Queen’s Dad were still alive, he’d be King and she’d only be a princess. Unless he abdicated or was a stepdad (Queen Mom’s consort). You see the dilemma?
The Setting:
An auction in or around Glencoe. Auctions out in the country are like garage sales in the city only bigger.
Blambdad: “Hey Peter, good to see you. How’s the Ice Queen doing?”
My father is stunned into silence. Is Blambdad talking about his wife? His boss? Who? And using a mean nickname for someone is pretty out of character for Blambdad.
Well, they eventually straightened it out.
Okay, maybe it wasn’t the best story. I’ll try harder.
In other news, Ice Prince and I made waffles for Fresh’s birthday breakfast yesterday.
“WE MADE YOU PARTY WAFFLES, DADDY!”
We also made an Angel Food Cake. Ice Prince covered it with a tea towel in the morning.
“I will put a blanket over it so I won’t eat it all and I won’t get a tummy ache.” My son, the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal.
Friday, April 23, 2004
Thursday, April 22, 2004
Buddy can you spare some tuition?
I found what I want to be when I grow up
Maybe I could take one course per semester. I need to set up a paypal here so my secret admirers can send me money.
I found what I want to be when I grow up
Maybe I could take one course per semester. I need to set up a paypal here so my secret admirers can send me money.
Culture Moment!
My favourite french poem, in honour of Snobby going to Montreal:
(I apologize for the mangled French. It's part memory loss and part linguistic incompetence.)
Le petit chat gris gris
A fait du pis pis
Sur le tapis
Son maman a dit
“Ce ne pas gentil
lever son queue
devant ses monsieurs”.
I'll translate later if there are any requests. But it's much better in French.
My favourite french poem, in honour of Snobby going to Montreal:
(I apologize for the mangled French. It's part memory loss and part linguistic incompetence.)
Le petit chat gris gris
A fait du pis pis
Sur le tapis
Son maman a dit
“Ce ne pas gentil
lever son queue
devant ses monsieurs”.
I'll translate later if there are any requests. But it's much better in French.
Wednesday, April 21, 2004
The Moral? May As Well Finish Your Dessert.
Clia A. Shapiro has recently published a book of pictures of inmates' last meals as requested before execution. (She recreated them for the pictures.) It makes you think about what you would want for your last meal. Something decadent like crème brulée? Something bad for you like KFC and fries (because it doesn’t matter now)? Something to remind you of what was important to you (like Nana’s bangers and mash with Mom’s famous pie for dessert? Or something that reminds you how very beautiful and miraculous life is (raspberries, mangoes, milk)?
Her photos aren’t on line, but here’s a list of last meals, if you’re curious.
(Sad note: When Rickey Ray Rector was executed, the mentally impaired inmate set aside half of his pecan pie for after the execution.)
Clia A. Shapiro has recently published a book of pictures of inmates' last meals as requested before execution. (She recreated them for the pictures.) It makes you think about what you would want for your last meal. Something decadent like crème brulée? Something bad for you like KFC and fries (because it doesn’t matter now)? Something to remind you of what was important to you (like Nana’s bangers and mash with Mom’s famous pie for dessert? Or something that reminds you how very beautiful and miraculous life is (raspberries, mangoes, milk)?
Her photos aren’t on line, but here’s a list of last meals, if you’re curious.
(Sad note: When Rickey Ray Rector was executed, the mentally impaired inmate set aside half of his pecan pie for after the execution.)
Tuesday, April 20, 2004
The Fab Five Tackles The Fab Four
She's leaving home unless you do something about the decor. As Oscar Wilde said just before he died "Either this wallpaper goes, or I do!"
She's leaving home unless you do something about the decor. As Oscar Wilde said just before he died "Either this wallpaper goes, or I do!"
Why Spring is like being in love
New beginning
Anything seems possible
Everything seems so much better than you remember
You feel beautiful, like a butterfly emerging from a cocoon
More moisture involved than you’d think necessary
Reason to buy new clothes
Messy and unpredictable
Things poking out everywhere
Can’t concentrate….
New beginning
Anything seems possible
Everything seems so much better than you remember
You feel beautiful, like a butterfly emerging from a cocoon
More moisture involved than you’d think necessary
Reason to buy new clothes
Messy and unpredictable
Things poking out everywhere
Can’t concentrate….
Monday, April 19, 2004
Conversation With the Ice Prince
Last night, I.P. went down to the basement bathroom to take care of business. A few minues later, I heard "Mommy! Mommy!" So down I go to check it out.
Ice Prince had the toilet paper roll holder in his hand and his pants around his ankles. "It broke."
So I go to put it back together. "Where's the toilet paper roll?"
"I flushed it."
"The WHOLE THING?!" (it was half a roll)
"Yes. It was an accident."
"How can you possibly accidentally flush half a roll of toilet paper down? I don't even think that's physically possible!"
"Sorry, mum."
The toilet is flushing slowly, but still works.
How is that possible? I never did find the roll so I can I only assume he managed to do it.
Last night, I.P. went down to the basement bathroom to take care of business. A few minues later, I heard "Mommy! Mommy!" So down I go to check it out.
Ice Prince had the toilet paper roll holder in his hand and his pants around his ankles. "It broke."
So I go to put it back together. "Where's the toilet paper roll?"
"I flushed it."
"The WHOLE THING?!" (it was half a roll)
"Yes. It was an accident."
"How can you possibly accidentally flush half a roll of toilet paper down? I don't even think that's physically possible!"
"Sorry, mum."
The toilet is flushing slowly, but still works.
How is that possible? I never did find the roll so I can I only assume he managed to do it.
Friday, April 16, 2004
My correspondence with a celebrity
You may remember that I donated a prize to the Bloggies for Best Canadian weblog. Well, mezzoblue was the winner. And it’s time to pay the piper. Here’s Dave’s reply to my e-mail:
Hi,
"I donated the book "Sweet Potato Queen's Book of Love" as the prize. Upon visiting your site, I'm not sure it's your sort of thing. Sooo....you may have the Sweet Potato Book OR you may receive a mystery book of equal value to be chosen by me. What do you think? Your choice. "
Quite possibly not. While the 'mystery book' idea has its appeal, I'm drowning in accumulating, yet unread books at the moment.
Tell you what -- instead of sending ME the book, why not either a) donate it to your local library, or even better b) go to bookcrossing.com and grab a label, then release it into the wild?
"In a bizarre coincidence, I stumbled your page trying to figure out CSS through the zen garden. And then I see you've won the prize I donated. Strange, strange. "
Very odd.
d.
What a hoopy frood that guy is. Okay, so I’m going to register the Sweet Potato Queen’s with bookcrossing and see what happens. But I feel he ought to receive some sort of prize. Maybe I should write him a song? Any suggestions for songs to base it on?
You may remember that I donated a prize to the Bloggies for Best Canadian weblog. Well, mezzoblue was the winner. And it’s time to pay the piper. Here’s Dave’s reply to my e-mail:
Hi,
"I donated the book "Sweet Potato Queen's Book of Love" as the prize. Upon visiting your site, I'm not sure it's your sort of thing. Sooo....you may have the Sweet Potato Book OR you may receive a mystery book of equal value to be chosen by me. What do you think? Your choice. "
Quite possibly not. While the 'mystery book' idea has its appeal, I'm drowning in accumulating, yet unread books at the moment.
Tell you what -- instead of sending ME the book, why not either a) donate it to your local library, or even better b) go to bookcrossing.com and grab a label, then release it into the wild?
"In a bizarre coincidence, I stumbled your page trying to figure out CSS through the zen garden. And then I see you've won the prize I donated. Strange, strange. "
Very odd.
d.
What a hoopy frood that guy is. Okay, so I’m going to register the Sweet Potato Queen’s with bookcrossing and see what happens. But I feel he ought to receive some sort of prize. Maybe I should write him a song? Any suggestions for songs to base it on?
Movin' On Up, To The East Side.....
Just take a wild guess as to where my first apartment was.
I'll admit it was nice and cheap and close to the university.....
Just take a wild guess as to where my first apartment was.
I'll admit it was nice and cheap and close to the university.....
Things that make me happy today
Nice man selling nice tulips for Parkinson’s society in the subway
Having money to buy tulips
Ice Prince looking cool in hoodie, jean jacket, shades and backwards denim cap
White gloves for holding tulips
All wine glasses being clean
Finding the dishes I want to buy at 40% off
Sunshine!
Big ass coffee
Hair that almost bounces and behaves
Run free nylons
Things that make me sad
Svend
Dishes I want are too heavy to get home. Don’t even know how to get them to the taxi!
House that really needs to be cleaned
60% chance of rain for Geezerpalooza BBQ
I’ve just found out that there is going to be a Queer Eye for the Straight Girl…in Los Angeles!
Nice man selling nice tulips for Parkinson’s society in the subway
Having money to buy tulips
Ice Prince looking cool in hoodie, jean jacket, shades and backwards denim cap
White gloves for holding tulips
All wine glasses being clean
Finding the dishes I want to buy at 40% off
Sunshine!
Big ass coffee
Hair that almost bounces and behaves
Run free nylons
Things that make me sad
Svend
Dishes I want are too heavy to get home. Don’t even know how to get them to the taxi!
House that really needs to be cleaned
60% chance of rain for Geezerpalooza BBQ
I’ve just found out that there is going to be a Queer Eye for the Straight Girl…in Los Angeles!
Thursday, April 15, 2004
Gimme Shelter
From Eva:
1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 23.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the sentence in your journal along with these instructions. (you can post it in the comments here if you like.)
“asylum n cover, haven, refuge, retreat, safety, sanctuary, shelter”
-- Oxford Thesaurus of Current English
Cool!
What’s Playing in my Head: Gimme Shelter by The Stones
Bonus Track Getting Better All The Time by The Beatles
From Eva:
1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 23.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the sentence in your journal along with these instructions. (you can post it in the comments here if you like.)
“asylum n cover, haven, refuge, retreat, safety, sanctuary, shelter”
-- Oxford Thesaurus of Current English
Cool!
What’s Playing in my Head: Gimme Shelter by The Stones
Bonus Track Getting Better All The Time by The Beatles
Wednesday, April 14, 2004
The Poem I Promised my Dear Friend Dave
Hey poetry fans, go check it out.
For you new readers, Crabby and I write poetry. Two Drink Minimum is our sadly neglected poetry blog. Think you don't like poetry? Check it out. You may be surprised.
Hey poetry fans, go check it out.
For you new readers, Crabby and I write poetry. Two Drink Minimum is our sadly neglected poetry blog. Think you don't like poetry? Check it out. You may be surprised.
Grab Bag
Me: If I had to choose one word to describe you it would be "earnest".
Fresh: If I had to describe you I'd say you were "no-nonsense."
Pause.
Me: "God, we sound boring."
So, what one word would you use to describe me? And you?
Boomer: "I'm so glad my new nephew's eyes are blue."
Me: "All newborns have blue eyes. They turn their true colour later."
Boomer: "They do? Even non-caucasian babies?"
That has me stumped. Anybody know? My educated guess would be that they aren't blue, but maybe a kinda of grey non-colour to start. Ice Prince's Eyes were sort of bluey-hazel but turned brown pretty quickly (couple of weeks).
So today is Virtue Day. I have a bunch of things I've been putting off and they must be done and I shall do them today. Or tomorrow if time doesn't permit. But Saturday is Debauchery Day when we have Geezerpalooza for Fresh and Mr. Crab's 38th birthdays. Egad, that seems like such a grown-up age. Can I really be married to a man who's turning 38? Most of the time, I barely feel like more than 14 myself.
Me: If I had to choose one word to describe you it would be "earnest".
Fresh: If I had to describe you I'd say you were "no-nonsense."
Pause.
Me: "God, we sound boring."
So, what one word would you use to describe me? And you?
Boomer: "I'm so glad my new nephew's eyes are blue."
Me: "All newborns have blue eyes. They turn their true colour later."
Boomer: "They do? Even non-caucasian babies?"
That has me stumped. Anybody know? My educated guess would be that they aren't blue, but maybe a kinda of grey non-colour to start. Ice Prince's Eyes were sort of bluey-hazel but turned brown pretty quickly (couple of weeks).
So today is Virtue Day. I have a bunch of things I've been putting off and they must be done and I shall do them today. Or tomorrow if time doesn't permit. But Saturday is Debauchery Day when we have Geezerpalooza for Fresh and Mr. Crab's 38th birthdays. Egad, that seems like such a grown-up age. Can I really be married to a man who's turning 38? Most of the time, I barely feel like more than 14 myself.
Monday, April 12, 2004
It's Tunes on Monday!
This one is inspired by Crabby's suggested title: House of Splenda. Okay, it's a bit self-depreciating, but after four months of couch rest, what do you expect? Besides, just a few more tests and I can start running again if I stay well. Hurrah! Pride Run, here I come!
House of Splenda
(to the tune of House of the Rising Sun, natch!)
There is a house in the Beaches.
Where the Merlot flows like rum
And it's been the ruin of many a Queen
And God I know I'm one.
Well Crabby’s been on Atkins
She’ll need some new bluejeans
And Mr. Crab has lost some flab
He’s now a lean machine
Now the only thing a Queen doth need
Is stockings and a crown
And if my stockings get a run
Then all I’ll do is frown
Oh mother tell your children
Not to do what I have done
My skirt’s too tight, it’s time for flight
To the House of the Splenda, son.
With one foot on the bedpost
And the other foot on the floor
Can’t squeeze my ass (thanks to that Wolf Blass)
Into my dress no more
There is a house in the Beaches
Where the Merlot flows like rum
And it's been the ruin of many a Queen
And thank God I am one.
This one is inspired by Crabby's suggested title: House of Splenda. Okay, it's a bit self-depreciating, but after four months of couch rest, what do you expect? Besides, just a few more tests and I can start running again if I stay well. Hurrah! Pride Run, here I come!
House of Splenda
(to the tune of House of the Rising Sun, natch!)
There is a house in the Beaches.
Where the Merlot flows like rum
And it's been the ruin of many a Queen
And God I know I'm one.
Well Crabby’s been on Atkins
She’ll need some new bluejeans
And Mr. Crab has lost some flab
He’s now a lean machine
Now the only thing a Queen doth need
Is stockings and a crown
And if my stockings get a run
Then all I’ll do is frown
Oh mother tell your children
Not to do what I have done
My skirt’s too tight, it’s time for flight
To the House of the Splenda, son.
With one foot on the bedpost
And the other foot on the floor
Can’t squeeze my ass (thanks to that Wolf Blass)
Into my dress no more
There is a house in the Beaches
Where the Merlot flows like rum
And it's been the ruin of many a Queen
And thank God I am one.
Homeland Security, Ice Prince-Style
Me: “So, the Easter Bunny comes this weekend. Do you know what the Easter Bunny does?”
Ice Prince (who's 3): “He calls the office and talks on the phone to Daddy.”
Me: “No, he brings chocolate eggs!”
IP: ‘Chocolate! Hurrah!”
Later that night:
Me” “You have to go to bed. The Easter Bunny will be here soon.”
I.P.: “You won’t let him in the house, will you?”
Me: “Huh?”
I.P.: “When he comes to the door, don’t let him in the house. Tell him to leave the eggs in the backyard, okay?”
Me: “Yeah, sure, kiddo, if that’s what you want.”
I.P.: “Remember, tell him he has to stay outside!”
Me: "Right"
I.P.: "Don't let him in the house!"
Me: "Okay, I promise!"
So we hid chocolate eggs outside and Ice Prince went around and had a great time finding them in the morning.
I just hope he doesn’t expect Santa to leave everything outside too.
Me: “So, the Easter Bunny comes this weekend. Do you know what the Easter Bunny does?”
Ice Prince (who's 3): “He calls the office and talks on the phone to Daddy.”
Me: “No, he brings chocolate eggs!”
IP: ‘Chocolate! Hurrah!”
Later that night:
Me” “You have to go to bed. The Easter Bunny will be here soon.”
I.P.: “You won’t let him in the house, will you?”
Me: “Huh?”
I.P.: “When he comes to the door, don’t let him in the house. Tell him to leave the eggs in the backyard, okay?”
Me: “Yeah, sure, kiddo, if that’s what you want.”
I.P.: “Remember, tell him he has to stay outside!”
Me: "Right"
I.P.: "Don't let him in the house!"
Me: "Okay, I promise!"
So we hid chocolate eggs outside and Ice Prince went around and had a great time finding them in the morning.
I just hope he doesn’t expect Santa to leave everything outside too.
Friday, April 09, 2004
Do you have that "Not So Fresh" Feeling?
I first found this site back in 1999. And I still love it. Take a good thorough wander around to get all of its chocolately goodness.
And a special treat that should get me into Eva's Carnival of Canucks for sure. I love Min Jun's t-shirt in this.
I first found this site back in 1999. And I still love it. Take a good thorough wander around to get all of its chocolately goodness.
And a special treat that should get me into Eva's Carnival of Canucks for sure. I love Min Jun's t-shirt in this.
Thursday, April 08, 2004
I’m Fresh Obsessed!
Today is the 16th anniversary of my meeting Fresh. Some of you newbies may wonder why my husband is called Fresh. Well, he’s a rather serious fellow, but for my 30th birthday, he set up a DJ stand in our tiny living room and his alter ego “Funky Fresh” was born.
Anyhow, we met at a dance. I went with Sister Staceypatrick and hooked up with my ex boyfriend. And then I met Fresh. I had spiky garnet hair and was wearing black and neon green (ah, the 80s!).
I remember he asked if he could kiss me at the end of the evening, which I thought was the sweetest thing.
Fresh and I are the yin to each other’s yang. I am silly and spontaneous. Fresh is serious and stable. Fresh is sentimental and emotional and I am…well…an ice queen. But what do we have in common? Let me think:
I like to cook. Fresh likes to eat.
We like Jon Stewart’s The Daily Show.
We like wine. A lot.
We like to have dinner parties.
We like to travel.
We like to read.
We are both in the field of communications, although we met when we were both studying theatre.
We both like jazz and blues and Bee Gees.
I like the crunchy fries and Fresh doesn’t.
We are socially liberal and fiscally conservative.
We both prefer cats to dogs as pets.
We like all the same foods and dislike all the same foods.
We both like to celebrate little things, like our 16th anniversary of meeting. (Heck, I just remembered Fresh giving me a “Happy 3 month anniversary of meeting” card.)
Any of you who know Fresh and me may feel free to expand on my yin/yang theory.
So here’s to Fresh and the fateful night 16 years ago.
Today is the 16th anniversary of my meeting Fresh. Some of you newbies may wonder why my husband is called Fresh. Well, he’s a rather serious fellow, but for my 30th birthday, he set up a DJ stand in our tiny living room and his alter ego “Funky Fresh” was born.
Anyhow, we met at a dance. I went with Sister Staceypatrick and hooked up with my ex boyfriend. And then I met Fresh. I had spiky garnet hair and was wearing black and neon green (ah, the 80s!).
I remember he asked if he could kiss me at the end of the evening, which I thought was the sweetest thing.
Fresh and I are the yin to each other’s yang. I am silly and spontaneous. Fresh is serious and stable. Fresh is sentimental and emotional and I am…well…an ice queen. But what do we have in common? Let me think:
I like to cook. Fresh likes to eat.
We like Jon Stewart’s The Daily Show.
We like wine. A lot.
We like to have dinner parties.
We like to travel.
We like to read.
We are both in the field of communications, although we met when we were both studying theatre.
We both like jazz and blues and Bee Gees.
I like the crunchy fries and Fresh doesn’t.
We are socially liberal and fiscally conservative.
We both prefer cats to dogs as pets.
We like all the same foods and dislike all the same foods.
We both like to celebrate little things, like our 16th anniversary of meeting. (Heck, I just remembered Fresh giving me a “Happy 3 month anniversary of meeting” card.)
Any of you who know Fresh and me may feel free to expand on my yin/yang theory.
So here’s to Fresh and the fateful night 16 years ago.
Tuesday, April 06, 2004
What-ever
The specialist says I am very healthy with low blood pressure and 100% lung capacity. So I either:
1. Have rare blood disease (unlikely)
2. Have a thyroid problem (causes exhaustion – makes me catch viruses)
3. Am a very busy working mom (see above brackets) who happens to be in the wrong places at the wrong times
Thanks. That helps. A few more tests to undergo, but otherwise – not much help. Hopefully the warmth and extended daylight will work wonders.
Fun With Google
The latest searches that led to my page:
sexy naked glencoe girls
"you don't look aboriginal" art
“lori Cullen"
jazz snoozin
snausages, sound clips
ice queen t-shirt
hot girls from acton ontario naked
"how to get a tight butt"
"how to open a door with a credit card"
chubby sedum
ladybug daycare toronto
"hey you kids get out of that jello tree"
The Continental Chistopher Walken
"student council" +"thunderation"
"how to get red wine stains out"
wisdom teeth OHIP
sexy queen fantasy pictures
Bleeding Gums Murphy Song 80s
The specialist says I am very healthy with low blood pressure and 100% lung capacity. So I either:
1. Have rare blood disease (unlikely)
2. Have a thyroid problem (causes exhaustion – makes me catch viruses)
3. Am a very busy working mom (see above brackets) who happens to be in the wrong places at the wrong times
Thanks. That helps. A few more tests to undergo, but otherwise – not much help. Hopefully the warmth and extended daylight will work wonders.
Fun With Google
The latest searches that led to my page:
sexy naked glencoe girls
"you don't look aboriginal" art
“lori Cullen"
jazz snoozin
snausages, sound clips
ice queen t-shirt
hot girls from acton ontario naked
"how to get a tight butt"
"how to open a door with a credit card"
chubby sedum
ladybug daycare toronto
"hey you kids get out of that jello tree"
The Continental Chistopher Walken
"student council" +"thunderation"
"how to get red wine stains out"
wisdom teeth OHIP
sexy queen fantasy pictures
Bleeding Gums Murphy Song 80s
That's Funny...I Thought I Was The Queen.
You are a GRAMMAR GOD!
If your mission in life is not already to
preserve the English tongue, it should be.
Congratulations and thank you!
How grammatically sound are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
You are a GRAMMAR GOD!
If your mission in life is not already to
preserve the English tongue, it should be.
Congratulations and thank you!
How grammatically sound are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
Friday, April 02, 2004
So I'm back from the pulmonary function test. You sit in a a booth and breathe in and out on a mouthpiece while that shoot all sorts of gasses into your mouth and take measurements. It's kinda like being in a p*o*r*n movie with The Borg.
Last night Boomer and I went to the Fashion Cares media launch where my suspicions were confirmed:
Luchadors (Mexican Wrestlers) are "in". (What's that you say?)
I still don't like martinis.
My boots are not made for walkin' (but they are very cute.)
I could probably put on a better special event than most people.
Bleagh. Feeling dizzy. Must be all the carbon monoxide from the test. I'll go lie down. If I don't wake up, thanks for reading.
Last night Boomer and I went to the Fashion Cares media launch where my suspicions were confirmed:
Luchadors (Mexican Wrestlers) are "in". (What's that you say?)
I still don't like martinis.
My boots are not made for walkin' (but they are very cute.)
I could probably put on a better special event than most people.
Bleagh. Feeling dizzy. Must be all the carbon monoxide from the test. I'll go lie down. If I don't wake up, thanks for reading.
Thursday, April 01, 2004
That's Just Great
The Weather Network has a special icon for drizzle.
In other news
I was thinking about the event this evening and I've decided that I need a signature drink. I already have a wine (red, preferrably pricey) and beer (Keith's), but I feel that I'm at a time in my life where I need a cocktail. Something with lime, I think.
Anyone care to suggest a cocktail we shall hereafter name "The Ice Queen"?
The Weather Network has a special icon for drizzle.
In other news
I was thinking about the event this evening and I've decided that I need a signature drink. I already have a wine (red, preferrably pricey) and beer (Keith's), but I feel that I'm at a time in my life where I need a cocktail. Something with lime, I think.
Anyone care to suggest a cocktail we shall hereafter name "The Ice Queen"?
Wednesday, March 31, 2004
No Foolin'!
A new picture of the Queen is forthcoming! Rejoice! Boomer is bringing his digital camera tomorrow. so there should be a new photo posted on Monday. The Queen shall be thinking up an appropriate honourary title for Boomer, the Official Photographer of the Queen.
In other news, I won't be posting any April Fools pranks tomorrow because, well, I'm just not that sharp lately. I will, however, be posting a true/false quiz of oddball Canadian Trivia for your edification and enjoyment.
Oh, and I got a wee raise. Nothing to overwhelming, but nice, nonetheless.
A new picture of the Queen is forthcoming! Rejoice! Boomer is bringing his digital camera tomorrow. so there should be a new photo posted on Monday. The Queen shall be thinking up an appropriate honourary title for Boomer, the Official Photographer of the Queen.
In other news, I won't be posting any April Fools pranks tomorrow because, well, I'm just not that sharp lately. I will, however, be posting a true/false quiz of oddball Canadian Trivia for your edification and enjoyment.
Oh, and I got a wee raise. Nothing to overwhelming, but nice, nonetheless.
Monday, March 29, 2004
She’s a very freaky girl. The kind you don’t take home to mother.
It’s officially spring. Ice Prince and I saw the first yellow crocuses (croci) this morning.
Spring also means our annual trek north to my sister-in-law’s house where all the tables are made out of glass. Great fun with a toddler, let me tell you. Her dining room is too small, so Ice Prince and I have to sit at the kid’s table in the kitchen with my niece.
Anyhow, last night, Fresh and I were watching the Food Network and saw this. “Hey, “says Fresh, “That would be a cool thing to make for taking up to my family.”
Yes! The opportunity to be creative! Fresh’s family already thinks I’m a bit of a freak, and I tend to perpetuate that view. Should be fun to try making, but I bet it’s not as easy as it looks….. Stay tuned for a progress report. The test kitchen will be trying to make pineapple daisies this weekend.
In other news, Boomer and I are going to some launch party for Fashion Cares on Thursday, which should be cool. It’s at The Mod Club. I’m just sad that I never found white go go boots, but I think I will make a trip to Global Village on my lunch hour and see what’s up in the world of retro secondhand wear. Should I wear the tiara?
It’s officially spring. Ice Prince and I saw the first yellow crocuses (croci) this morning.
Spring also means our annual trek north to my sister-in-law’s house where all the tables are made out of glass. Great fun with a toddler, let me tell you. Her dining room is too small, so Ice Prince and I have to sit at the kid’s table in the kitchen with my niece.
Anyhow, last night, Fresh and I were watching the Food Network and saw this. “Hey, “says Fresh, “That would be a cool thing to make for taking up to my family.”
Yes! The opportunity to be creative! Fresh’s family already thinks I’m a bit of a freak, and I tend to perpetuate that view. Should be fun to try making, but I bet it’s not as easy as it looks….. Stay tuned for a progress report. The test kitchen will be trying to make pineapple daisies this weekend.
In other news, Boomer and I are going to some launch party for Fashion Cares on Thursday, which should be cool. It’s at The Mod Club. I’m just sad that I never found white go go boots, but I think I will make a trip to Global Village on my lunch hour and see what’s up in the world of retro secondhand wear. Should I wear the tiara?
Thursday, March 25, 2004
Always Look on the Bright Side of Life
For those who can't stomach The Passion of the Christ, how about the rerelease of Life of Brian?
Jesus would be rolling over in his grave. If he were still in there.
For those who can't stomach The Passion of the Christ, how about the rerelease of Life of Brian?
Jesus would be rolling over in his grave. If he were still in there.
Wednesday, March 24, 2004
Spring! When a young girl's thoughts turn to...
Feeling better today. Probably mainly due to the fact that Ice Prince has finally stopped coughing after 4 weeks and I got a decent night’s sleep. Plus, spring is coming, which means three things:
#1 Patio Watch 2004:
All Church and Bloor readers are hereby on yellow alert for patio weather. Your liver deserves no less. Be prepared. It could happen at any time.
#2 It’s time to once again share with you my favourite spring poem:
Patio Sweaters
by Trevor Kriegel
Patio! Patio! Patio!
Spring's back in town
And I've got a radio!
It's patio time!
We'll drink drinks that call for limes!
The temperature is getting better,
But I still need a lightweight sweater!
It's patio time!
#3 The Ice Queen’s Annual Spring Fashion Statement:
Spring 2004 sees the Ice Queen wearing white gloves. And probably buying some bleach. (for the gloves, not the hair, silly rabbit)
I have been toying with the idea of asking Crabby and Sister to guest blog, since they don't seem to have time for their own blogs anymore. Or we could merge. Or "Corporate Takeover by Ice Queen!" What would we call an amalgamated blog?
Feeling better today. Probably mainly due to the fact that Ice Prince has finally stopped coughing after 4 weeks and I got a decent night’s sleep. Plus, spring is coming, which means three things:
#1 Patio Watch 2004:
All Church and Bloor readers are hereby on yellow alert for patio weather. Your liver deserves no less. Be prepared. It could happen at any time.
#2 It’s time to once again share with you my favourite spring poem:
Patio Sweaters
by Trevor Kriegel
Patio! Patio! Patio!
Spring's back in town
And I've got a radio!
It's patio time!
We'll drink drinks that call for limes!
The temperature is getting better,
But I still need a lightweight sweater!
It's patio time!
#3 The Ice Queen’s Annual Spring Fashion Statement:
Spring 2004 sees the Ice Queen wearing white gloves. And probably buying some bleach. (for the gloves, not the hair, silly rabbit)
I have been toying with the idea of asking Crabby and Sister to guest blog, since they don't seem to have time for their own blogs anymore. Or we could merge. Or "Corporate Takeover by Ice Queen!" What would we call an amalgamated blog?
Tuesday, March 23, 2004
Suicide by Crucifixion. D’oh!
According to the Maine Press Herald, “When he realized that he was unable to nail his other hand to the board, he called 911," Boucher said. It was unclear whether the man was seeking assistance for his injury or help in nailing down his other hand.
According to the Maine Press Herald, “When he realized that he was unable to nail his other hand to the board, he called 911," Boucher said. It was unclear whether the man was seeking assistance for his injury or help in nailing down his other hand.
Friday, March 19, 2004
Test O' The Week
The Pulmonary Function Test on April 2nd, whereby they put me in a plexiglass box, make me breathe carbon monoxide and then measure how much carbon monoxide I breathe out.
Maybe they figure if they try hard enough, they can kill me and then they won't have to make a diagnosis.
Why do none of these tests involve pedicures and Shiraz?
The Pulmonary Function Test on April 2nd, whereby they put me in a plexiglass box, make me breathe carbon monoxide and then measure how much carbon monoxide I breathe out.
Maybe they figure if they try hard enough, they can kill me and then they won't have to make a diagnosis.
Why do none of these tests involve pedicures and Shiraz?
Wednesday, March 17, 2004
Tuesday, March 09, 2004
Test of the Week
The Nuclear Lung Scan
Oh sure, it doesn't sound pretty, but it's got to be better than the Barium Enema listed on the left sidebar.
The Nuclear Lung Scan
Oh sure, it doesn't sound pretty, but it's got to be better than the Barium Enema listed on the left sidebar.
Monday, March 08, 2004
If Simpsons Characters Mated
Note: Use the scroll bar right next to the pictures, not the one on your browser.
Note: Use the scroll bar right next to the pictures, not the one on your browser.
Odds and ends
1. I didn't tell you about when my parents were down about two weeks ago. They have a new obsession. Orginally, I thought it was just my dad, but my mom is right in on it too.
They each have a Gameboy.
2. My slippers are black satin with green feathers on them.
3. Gay marriage: good. Planned C-sections without medical reasons (being a woose is not a medical reason): very very bad.
4. Oscars: I could do better. Event planning I mean.
5. I get to go out to Girl's Night on Saturday!
6. Stupid bloody snow. I left my boots at work. Why do we live in Canada? Why won't Fresh surprise me and take me somewhere warm? Why doesn't Dr. H prescribe that I spend the rest of March someplace warm, with seafood and wine and cats?
7. If I had a rocket launcher, I'd probably paint it a really nice colour.
1. I didn't tell you about when my parents were down about two weeks ago. They have a new obsession. Orginally, I thought it was just my dad, but my mom is right in on it too.
They each have a Gameboy.
2. My slippers are black satin with green feathers on them.
3. Gay marriage: good. Planned C-sections without medical reasons (being a woose is not a medical reason): very very bad.
4. Oscars: I could do better. Event planning I mean.
5. I get to go out to Girl's Night on Saturday!
6. Stupid bloody snow. I left my boots at work. Why do we live in Canada? Why won't Fresh surprise me and take me somewhere warm? Why doesn't Dr. H prescribe that I spend the rest of March someplace warm, with seafood and wine and cats?
7. If I had a rocket launcher, I'd probably paint it a really nice colour.
Friday, March 05, 2004
And I'll Have Fun Fun Fun Now That Hibbert Took the TBird Away
I don't have TB -- yet anyway. I get another test next week. I just have some mystery condition that makes me sleep 16 hours a day and get pneumonia every other month.
So, I get to see a Respirologist. And I get to drink until they decide what the next round of meds will be. (This morning, I opened my cupboard and a bunch of pill bottles fell on my head. Naturally, I started singing: "It's Raining Meds, Hallelujah! It's Raining Meds! Hey, hey!" As Fresh would say, "At least you still have your sense of humour."
I am soooo sick of this stupid house. I'm sick of Ellen Degeneres and I'm even sick of the plotline on Coronation Street.
I have some art supplies I bought at the end of my last convalescence, so I am going to paint Fresh a picture today. If I can stay awake that long.
Send lesbian porn. Which reminds me, did you know that The Beaver is a magazine about Canadian History? What a disappointment.
P.S. to Readers: No, I'm not a lesbian, but I play one on TV.
P.P.S. to Readers: I'm not really on TV. But open to offers.
I don't have TB -- yet anyway. I get another test next week. I just have some mystery condition that makes me sleep 16 hours a day and get pneumonia every other month.
So, I get to see a Respirologist. And I get to drink until they decide what the next round of meds will be. (This morning, I opened my cupboard and a bunch of pill bottles fell on my head. Naturally, I started singing: "It's Raining Meds, Hallelujah! It's Raining Meds! Hey, hey!" As Fresh would say, "At least you still have your sense of humour."
I am soooo sick of this stupid house. I'm sick of Ellen Degeneres and I'm even sick of the plotline on Coronation Street.
I have some art supplies I bought at the end of my last convalescence, so I am going to paint Fresh a picture today. If I can stay awake that long.
Send lesbian porn. Which reminds me, did you know that The Beaver is a magazine about Canadian History? What a disappointment.
P.S. to Readers: No, I'm not a lesbian, but I play one on TV.
P.P.S. to Readers: I'm not really on TV. But open to offers.
Monday, March 01, 2004
This Post Sponsored By Reynolds Saran Wrap®
Dr. Hibbert: So, we got the CT results back. Good news. There's no sign of cancer. (Dr. H looks visibly relieved)
Me: Good...
Dr. H: But it does show scarring from past tuberculosis.
Me: I've never had tuberculosis.
Dr H: (big pause) Oh dear. Had any night sweats?
Me: Yeah...last week.
Dr. H: (another big pause) Oh dear. I think we'll give you a TB test. Come back on Wednesday for the results. And take the rest of the week off and rest. You look exhausted.
Tuberculosis used to be fatal and all, but not any more, so don't worry. Boomer, don't tell my boss yet, I'll call her. (She's a bit of an alarmist when it comes to sickness. She'll probably wrap my workstation in Saran®) Besides, I may not have it. But if I don't, why did Dr. H say when I came in on Wednesday that I could jump queue and not wait in the waiting room?
And thanks to Sister for the flowers. They've bloomed and they rook mah-velous, darlink. And smell good too.
Dr. Hibbert: So, we got the CT results back. Good news. There's no sign of cancer. (Dr. H looks visibly relieved)
Me: Good...
Dr. H: But it does show scarring from past tuberculosis.
Me: I've never had tuberculosis.
Dr H: (big pause) Oh dear. Had any night sweats?
Me: Yeah...last week.
Dr. H: (another big pause) Oh dear. I think we'll give you a TB test. Come back on Wednesday for the results. And take the rest of the week off and rest. You look exhausted.
Tuberculosis used to be fatal and all, but not any more, so don't worry. Boomer, don't tell my boss yet, I'll call her. (She's a bit of an alarmist when it comes to sickness. She'll probably wrap my workstation in Saran®) Besides, I may not have it. But if I don't, why did Dr. H say when I came in on Wednesday that I could jump queue and not wait in the waiting room?
And thanks to Sister for the flowers. They've bloomed and they rook mah-velous, darlink. And smell good too.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)