Monday, May 31, 2004

Voulez-vous Couchez Avec Moi Ce Soir?
Mr. Crabby didn’t want to go to Fashion Cares after all so I got to go with Crabby!

I wore a silver floor length crochet dress (yes, it was lined.) Crabby wore a black Audrey Hepburn-eque sheath dress.

We drank Funkdeified martinis (weird name, but they are sort of like spiked ginger lemonade), I did Karaoke with the B-Girlz . I sang New York New York (there were only 4 choices I chose the one least sung just to get up there). I even had back-up singers and dancers. Afterwards, pink B-girl said I was very Bridget Jones.
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I will take that as a compliment – goofy and hapless but charming nonetheless. They will be mailing me a DVD of my performance. I will post the file if I can and then you can download my mortification. And see the nice dress. (NOTE: Boomer just dropped by and said he could make copies of the DVD, so now I’ve decided to design a cover and sell them with proceeds going to my Pride Run fund. Why shouldn’t I/they profit from my humiliation? Boomer also compared me to William Hung even though he’s never heard me sing.)

The boutique area was great and cheap. By the time we got there, things had been picked over, but I found and bought a shirt I found that had slipped off a hanger. “You don’t buy off the rack, you buy off the floor!” quipped Crabby.

The show was loud and wonderful. Mad violinist, flying monkey people on trapezes, chaps cut in interesting places, and great singers (especially Simone Denny and Patti laBelle). The only disappointment was Linda Evangelista, who looked lovely, but read a poorly written and short speech at the beginning.

Afterwards we got free blue cocktails in wee martini glasses, glow sticks and free Haagan Daas!

I don’t think I saw Mikevil. And I forgot the tiara on the way out the door, which I continued to moan about to poor Crabby who has to put up with me.

Thank you Crabby for inviting me and thank you Planet Aid for the $15 gown. And thank you B-girlz for not pulling me off the stage with a hook.

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