"I Can't Believe It's Not Groundhog!®"
Milverton Mel Says: "Six More Weeks of Winter. And would it kill you to freshen the water in my bowl? No, not the tap stuff, the good Britta filter stuff. Do you want me to get a Urinary Tract Infection? And about that kid. Who was the ad wizard who decided to buy him musical instruments for Christmas, huh? Why don't you just get him a Little Johnny Vet Kit, for all the good it does me. And do you have to turn down the heat when you leave for the day? I mean, sure I've got a fur coat, but it ain't what it used to be, if you catch my drift. If I could manage a kitty combover, I would, I swear. And just because YOU don't watch to watch Matlock reruns, doesn't mean that I wouldn't like to see them sometimes. Did you know that Kevin Smith was on Degrassi and I MISSED IT? There are other programs than the news, you know. If the service doesn't pick up around the place soon, I'll answer the phone next time Johnny from Best Price Movers phones and arrange to have all your furniture shipped to Goodwill. My accent can't possibly be worse than his. And another thing..."