Ice Prince's First Day of School
How did it go? How did it go you ask? Well, if I may quote the musical Oliver!:
"Boy, boy for sale!
He's going cheap
Only seven shillings.
Have you ever seen as nice
A boy for sale?"
No, Seriously, Was It Really That Bad?
It was awful. Ice Prince saw the playground at the school and had a TOTAL meltdown because he couldn't go play. TOTAL. Screaming, crying, yelling, flailing. All the other parents and their docile children stood staring and me and the spawn of Satan.
Nothing as Nice As A Hearty Welcome!
I finally got him over to the JK line, where he collapsed in a snit heap. The teacher came down the line greeting all the children. "This is Colin, " I said, with a sheepish smile.
"Why are you here?" she replied.
"He's in your class."
"I'll just have to check that."
"I have a letter right here from the school."
She examined the letter.
"Well, this is all wrong, but since he's already here, he might as well stay."
(It seems the teacher is supposed to have the parent interview BEFORE the first day and the school screwed up on sending me the info.)
Harper Valley PTA Meets The Ice Queen
During the hour (first day is only an hour long), another parent and I went up to the staff lounge where the PTA President and her minion were hosting a welcome coffee for parents. Three of us showed up.
Well, it was dull as toast. The Pres regaled us with wasp-y PTA thrills, such as the Family Dance! The BBQ! The Free Apples for Children Once A Year! The Fitness Mural they comissioned! When the other parent suggested a clothing exchange (Parents bringing in stuff their darling had outgrown) I piped up:
"I have experience in event planning too. Although they seldom end in a clothing exchange unless there's an open bar involved."
Right now the PTA Pres is secretly hoping I don't join, and I'm thinking of doing so just to make her life a living hell.
(P.S. Yes, I really said that, and several other "inappropriate" things.)
It's My Potty And I'll Cry If I Want To
So I pick up the boy after the hour, and again with the tantrum and the screaming and so forth. And more parents staring. These are the neighbours I had planned to meet and befriend. Sigh. Maybe they'll like me better after they attend the "clothing exchange".
Then I went to Fresh's office, closed his door and cried for half an hour.
Tomorrow is our interview with the teacher (which is "all wrong"). Will she suggest Ice Prince wait a year? Can they possibly expel him from Junior Kindergarten? Will Ice Queen turn the PTA on its head (I did promise to show up to the Family Dance in a prom dress and corsage...)?