Thursday, September 04, 2003

Ice Queen's Greatest Hits

I feel guilty I haven't blogged today. Here's a Golden Oldie from the Ice Queen circa 1999:

Due to increasing product liability litigation, red wine manufacturers have accepted the Medical Association's suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all red wine bottles.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may make you think "These aren't my shoes!"
WARNING: consumption of alcohol is a major factor in speaking in Scottish brogue.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cure your leukemia.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to pull potted plants out of public urns.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to wake up to the smell of stale cumin.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may result in gators in your bra.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may bring out your alter ego: Funky Fresh.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to switch shoes with friends.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to invite your friends' neighbour over to your impromptu 80's party.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to put on Come On Eileen again. And again. And again.

Feel free to contribute.



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