The Skirt Report
We here at Icicle Fief (that’d be me and Boomer) have conducted an exhaustive research study. Today I am wearing my “cranberry” skirt.
We asked two men what colour my skirt is. They initially looked suspicious, but finally responded.
Guy 1: Maroon.
Guy 2: Brown.
Guy 1 is single and is suspected to be gay despite the fact that he has a long suffering girlfriend.
Guy 2 is married with a young son.
So the verdict is:
TRUE. Real Men can’t distinguish colours. (When I called Guy 1 a girly-man after his response, he was pleased.)
Icicle Fief: For All Your Quality Market Research Needs.
Thursday, September 30, 2004
The Queen Strikes Back
Markus has recently suggested on his blog that he uses a Darth Vader helmet during extracurricular activities with Mikevil.
Might I suggest this site to Mr. Evil?
Markus has recently suggested on his blog that he uses a Darth Vader helmet during extracurricular activities with Mikevil.
Might I suggest this site to Mr. Evil?
Wednesday, September 29, 2004
A Slice of Ice Queen's Job
In the copy I've just been given:
"The Centre is provider independent and technology and process agnostic."
Does it mean to say that the Centre doesn't believe we can know anything about technology and process?
What word can they possibly have mistaken this for? Or is this a new business buzzword? Or is it merely a bad case of Spell Chek?
In the copy I've just been given:
"The Centre is provider independent and technology and process agnostic."
Does it mean to say that the Centre doesn't believe we can know anything about technology and process?
What word can they possibly have mistaken this for? Or is this a new business buzzword? Or is it merely a bad case of Spell Chek?
I Am An S-M-R-T Shopper
Productive day yesterday. I got my pneumonia vaccine and then I went to Value Village and got:
Liz Claiborne wool skirt
Cranberry coloured suede skirt
Cranberry coloured taffeta shell top
Beautiful tiger costume (guess what IP wants to be for Hallowe’en?)
Icky tiger costume (in case he turned up his nose at the nice one. He didn't.)
Brown alligator pumps (Marks and Sparks – look like they were never worn)
Fairisle wool mitts
Camel coloured wool scarf
All for $35.
Lookin’ goooo-oood!
Productive day yesterday. I got my pneumonia vaccine and then I went to Value Village and got:
Liz Claiborne wool skirt
Cranberry coloured suede skirt
Cranberry coloured taffeta shell top
Beautiful tiger costume (guess what IP wants to be for Hallowe’en?)
Icky tiger costume (in case he turned up his nose at the nice one. He didn't.)
Brown alligator pumps (Marks and Sparks – look like they were never worn)
Fairisle wool mitts
Camel coloured wool scarf
All for $35.
Lookin’ goooo-oood!
Tuesday, September 28, 2004
Breaking News!
My hapless headhunters want me to be an Underwear Designer!
"Our client, a Canadian owned and operated, Intimate Apparel Manufacturer, located in Truro, Nova Scotia is seeking an Apparel/Graphic Designer, who has experience working with large retailers, to work in their head office. This position is located in Truro, Nova Scotia. All relocation cost will be paid."
I'd like to move to Nova Scotia, but, sadly, have limited knowledge of knicker construction.
My hapless headhunters want me to be an Underwear Designer!
"Our client, a Canadian owned and operated, Intimate Apparel Manufacturer, located in Truro, Nova Scotia is seeking an Apparel/Graphic Designer, who has experience working with large retailers, to work in their head office. This position is located in Truro, Nova Scotia. All relocation cost will be paid."
I'd like to move to Nova Scotia, but, sadly, have limited knowledge of knicker construction.
More From the Grab Bag
Didn’t get to run this morning because my alarm woke Ice Prince up. I had to crawl in with him. He never quite goes back to sleep, so he talked to me for an hour in the dark. Suddenly, he said “Mommy, you deserve a new dress!” Nice, I thought.
When Fresh woke up, IP bolted into the bathroom:
“Daddy! Daddy! We have to buy Mommy a new dress!”
“Sure kid, are you going to pay for it?”
“It’s okay. Mommy has money.”
Watched the Muppet Show last night while I ironed.
Hootchie Mama has a daughter. Didn’t manage to see the daughter’s shoes. But I decided that if I wore some very cool shoes, maybe she’d comment on them and we’d start talking. Hmmm…….
In the comments section, I spoke of a bossy parent at the school. Know who she looked like? Remember in Priscilla Queen of the Desert when Bernice tells the mean woman in the bar to light he tampon because that’s the only bang she’ll ever get? That’s what this parent looked like. The mean woman. Not Bernice.
I want to be Bernice when I grow up. I think she’s beautiful and strong and smart.
When I Was an Icicle…
Ice Prince goes to the school library on Mondays. I remember when I was in Grade 1, we got to go to the library and take out a book. I only took one book out, I kept renewing it over and over again. The book was Little Witch’s Black Magic Cookbook. Funny how I still have a passion for cooking, eh?
I wonder what IP will bring home.
Didn’t get to run this morning because my alarm woke Ice Prince up. I had to crawl in with him. He never quite goes back to sleep, so he talked to me for an hour in the dark. Suddenly, he said “Mommy, you deserve a new dress!” Nice, I thought.
When Fresh woke up, IP bolted into the bathroom:
“Daddy! Daddy! We have to buy Mommy a new dress!”
“Sure kid, are you going to pay for it?”
“It’s okay. Mommy has money.”
Watched the Muppet Show last night while I ironed.
Hootchie Mama has a daughter. Didn’t manage to see the daughter’s shoes. But I decided that if I wore some very cool shoes, maybe she’d comment on them and we’d start talking. Hmmm…….
In the comments section, I spoke of a bossy parent at the school. Know who she looked like? Remember in Priscilla Queen of the Desert when Bernice tells the mean woman in the bar to light he tampon because that’s the only bang she’ll ever get? That’s what this parent looked like. The mean woman. Not Bernice.
I want to be Bernice when I grow up. I think she’s beautiful and strong and smart.
When I Was an Icicle…
Ice Prince goes to the school library on Mondays. I remember when I was in Grade 1, we got to go to the library and take out a book. I only took one book out, I kept renewing it over and over again. The book was Little Witch’s Black Magic Cookbook. Funny how I still have a passion for cooking, eh?
I wonder what IP will bring home.
Monday, September 27, 2004
Bit and Bites
Go enjoy the Haiku O' Truth. Yeah, baby, yeah.
I am currently reading the book The Nanny Diaries. In it, there is a chapter called "Night of the Banking Dead." Do I sense a new drinking night name? I think I do!
My running's going fine. Thanks for asking. I seem to have lost weight. I almost fit back into my leather skirt, which is nice. Unfortnately, I now need to buy a smaller sports bra or suffer whiplash.
Hootchie Mama had on such spectacular shoes today (silver stilletos with laces up the calves, you know) that a little girl behind Ice Prince in the Kindergarten line yelled out: "Mommy, look at that lady's fancy shoes!" I am determined to make friends with her - or at least speak to her. She gets off in her get up at Bay Station every morning. Maybe we could car pool! Oh, wait. I don't have a car. Never mind.
Go enjoy the Haiku O' Truth. Yeah, baby, yeah.
I am currently reading the book The Nanny Diaries. In it, there is a chapter called "Night of the Banking Dead." Do I sense a new drinking night name? I think I do!
My running's going fine. Thanks for asking. I seem to have lost weight. I almost fit back into my leather skirt, which is nice. Unfortnately, I now need to buy a smaller sports bra or suffer whiplash.
Hootchie Mama had on such spectacular shoes today (silver stilletos with laces up the calves, you know) that a little girl behind Ice Prince in the Kindergarten line yelled out: "Mommy, look at that lady's fancy shoes!" I am determined to make friends with her - or at least speak to her. She gets off in her get up at Bay Station every morning. Maybe we could car pool! Oh, wait. I don't have a car. Never mind.
Saturday, September 25, 2004
Brand Yourself!
I also found a great slogan generator. Try it yourself!
I also enjoyed:
"Gonna be a while? Grab an Ice Queen."
"All you Need Is an Ice Queen and a Dream."
"Oh Hungry? Oh Ice Queen!"
Although if I were Markus, I be a bit concerned about THIS one:
I also found a great slogan generator. Try it yourself!
I also enjoyed:
"Gonna be a while? Grab an Ice Queen."
"All you Need Is an Ice Queen and a Dream."
"Oh Hungry? Oh Ice Queen!"
Although if I were Markus, I be a bit concerned about THIS one:
Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves
Ice Prince is currently making me watch Lady and the Tramp for what must be the 40th time. And when you watch a movie so many times, you begin to ask questions:
For Example:
In the bedroom scene, Lady's owners are sleeping together in the same bed. This movie was made in 1955. In the 50's, Lucy and Ricky had to have twin beds and so did Laura and Rob on the Dick Van Dyke Show in the 60s. Not until the late 60s were Samantha and Darrin of Bewitched allowed to share the marital bed.
However, reaserch reveals that ONCE earlier on the I Love Lucy Show, Fred and Ethel shared a bed out of necessity. The year? 1955.
Were Lady's libertine owners the ground breakers? If an animated children's feature could show people sleeping together, why couldn't television?
Yes, here at the Icicle Fief, we like taking on the tough political issues. Of 1955.
Ice Prince is currently making me watch Lady and the Tramp for what must be the 40th time. And when you watch a movie so many times, you begin to ask questions:
For Example:
In the bedroom scene, Lady's owners are sleeping together in the same bed. This movie was made in 1955. In the 50's, Lucy and Ricky had to have twin beds and so did Laura and Rob on the Dick Van Dyke Show in the 60s. Not until the late 60s were Samantha and Darrin of Bewitched allowed to share the marital bed.
However, reaserch reveals that ONCE earlier on the I Love Lucy Show, Fred and Ethel shared a bed out of necessity. The year? 1955.
Were Lady's libertine owners the ground breakers? If an animated children's feature could show people sleeping together, why couldn't television?
Yes, here at the Icicle Fief, we like taking on the tough political issues. Of 1955.
Friday, September 24, 2004
Blame It On The Pocky
So Fresh has been working crazy crazy hours since his promotion. He gets home around 9 at night and leaves before I do in the morning. Haven’t seen much of him or had a chance to talk.
Yesterday he opens up the cupboard and finds a Berlitz CD I got from the library.
“You’re learning Japanese? Since when?”
I wonder if he thinks I’m having an affair with someone Japanese? Buwahahahahahaha!
P.S. To Crabby: I promise to leave David Suzuki alone. He’d probably just bitch to me about the fact that green wine bottles (which most red comes in) are not technically recyclable.
So Fresh has been working crazy crazy hours since his promotion. He gets home around 9 at night and leaves before I do in the morning. Haven’t seen much of him or had a chance to talk.
Yesterday he opens up the cupboard and finds a Berlitz CD I got from the library.
“You’re learning Japanese? Since when?”
I wonder if he thinks I’m having an affair with someone Japanese? Buwahahahahahaha!
P.S. To Crabby: I promise to leave David Suzuki alone. He’d probably just bitch to me about the fact that green wine bottles (which most red comes in) are not technically recyclable.
Thursday, September 23, 2004
"Baby. It's 3am I must be psycho...."
Hey, remember I said at least this wasn't the antibiotic that makes me psycotic?
Well, guess what. It is.
Just woke up in a total panic about not having put the mortgage money in my account in time. Ran downstairs, desperate to try to get the money in the account. Turned on the computer to transfer some money, pulled on my sneakers to go despoit some cash.
And realized that it's not due to come out until tomorrow.
Oh boy. I can't wait to go to work and see what drugged up Ice Queen can manage to accomplish there. Especially with that old Performance Review thing.
Never a dull moment!
Hey, remember I said at least this wasn't the antibiotic that makes me psycotic?
Well, guess what. It is.
Just woke up in a total panic about not having put the mortgage money in my account in time. Ran downstairs, desperate to try to get the money in the account. Turned on the computer to transfer some money, pulled on my sneakers to go despoit some cash.
And realized that it's not due to come out until tomorrow.
Oh boy. I can't wait to go to work and see what drugged up Ice Queen can manage to accomplish there. Especially with that old Performance Review thing.
Never a dull moment!
Wednesday, September 22, 2004
Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired
At home sick. Dr. Hibbert says I have a floppy and infected uvula (that's the hanging thing at the back of your throat, you dirty-minded dyslexics). It feels gross, like I'm choking, and is excruciatingly painful.
"Hee hee hee! What am I going to do with you? Here, try these antibiotics. If you're not better in 24 hours, call me immediately, you'll need a shot."
Or maybe he said I'll need to BE shot. I really must listen more carefully.
Naturally, my anibiotics have side effects which are icky and you don't need to know, but it's better than the ones that made me psychotic, running around the house in a panic, thinking we'd lost the Ice Prince. (that was last year)
I'm supposed to be working on my I-PEP (my fellow employees know of which I speak), but I find it's hard to write when I'm not in a good self-esteem mode. Now I feel like I may be sliding back into 6 months of illness like last year at this very time. (new readers: I was on STD --not HAD an STD-- for about 3 months last winter. A couple of bouts of pneumonia.) I'm so worried it will happen again.
Sorry I'm not more amusing today. But if anyone wants to say anthing to boost my self-esteem, it would help greatly in inspiring me to write my performance appraisal. Yes, we write our own. "I invented the Internet. I devised a way to turn used toner cartridges into fossil fuels. I donated my gold fillings to the employee incentive program. I am love." Sigh.
At home sick. Dr. Hibbert says I have a floppy and infected uvula (that's the hanging thing at the back of your throat, you dirty-minded dyslexics). It feels gross, like I'm choking, and is excruciatingly painful.
"Hee hee hee! What am I going to do with you? Here, try these antibiotics. If you're not better in 24 hours, call me immediately, you'll need a shot."
Or maybe he said I'll need to BE shot. I really must listen more carefully.
Naturally, my anibiotics have side effects which are icky and you don't need to know, but it's better than the ones that made me psychotic, running around the house in a panic, thinking we'd lost the Ice Prince. (that was last year)
I'm supposed to be working on my I-PEP (my fellow employees know of which I speak), but I find it's hard to write when I'm not in a good self-esteem mode. Now I feel like I may be sliding back into 6 months of illness like last year at this very time. (new readers: I was on STD --not HAD an STD-- for about 3 months last winter. A couple of bouts of pneumonia.) I'm so worried it will happen again.
Sorry I'm not more amusing today. But if anyone wants to say anthing to boost my self-esteem, it would help greatly in inspiring me to write my performance appraisal. Yes, we write our own. "I invented the Internet. I devised a way to turn used toner cartridges into fossil fuels. I donated my gold fillings to the employee incentive program. I am love." Sigh.
Sunday, September 19, 2004
Smoke 'Em If You Got 'Em
Pocky, that is.
View more fine photos like this over at Mikevil's. It's worth the drive to Acton!
Pocky, that is.
View more fine photos like this over at Mikevil's. It's worth the drive to Acton!
Saturday, September 18, 2004
But all in good taste, of course
I managed to make it home from Bankers Gone Wild night with all my clothes, which was a nice change of pace. Now that I'm awake (and mercifully not hungover by some miracle), I'm concerned about certain pictures - volumes of pictures that were taken. I'm sure JustMark (whom I adore, incidentally. You may keep him.) will post them toute suite when he and Mr. Evil get back from Gaelic class. If they ever made it there. (I don't understand people who are shy about having their photo taken. Silly rabbits!)
Too much fun! Thank you Mikevil, JustMark, Sister Stacey Patrick and Boomer for a night to remember. If I only could.....
I managed to make it home from Bankers Gone Wild night with all my clothes, which was a nice change of pace. Now that I'm awake (and mercifully not hungover by some miracle), I'm concerned about certain pictures - volumes of pictures that were taken. I'm sure JustMark (whom I adore, incidentally. You may keep him.) will post them toute suite when he and Mr. Evil get back from Gaelic class. If they ever made it there. (I don't understand people who are shy about having their photo taken. Silly rabbits!)
Too much fun! Thank you Mikevil, JustMark, Sister Stacey Patrick and Boomer for a night to remember. If I only could.....
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